Babysitter Kakashi
by AppleBlossoms
Summary: An unfortunate event leaves team 7 as cute little kids that are more devilsh than angelic. Naruto creates mayhem,Sasuke gets protective & you'd think he & Sakura were the good ones.& Kakashi has to take care of them too.Poor,innocent kakashi indeed.Saksas
1. Chapter 1

Summary- I don't own Naruto. This is a story about when team 7 turns into little 4 year olds all due to a crazy hokage and poor Kakashi has to take care of three energetic, hyper kids. Poor Kakashi indeed. Paring sas/sak.

"Hey you put that down, NOW" Tsunade shouted. This was the 3rd time Naruto had picked up a big bottle of delicate sake and threatened to pour it out the window, his throat, or someone else's throat.

"Hey, hey old granny look at what I can do" Naruto yelled hanging out the window, his toes somehow holding on the window sill. Tsunade grinned and went to unlatch his toes (Naruto had decided shoes were bad for him). He wanted to fly? She would gladly give him a helping hand. Muhhaaha.

" Tsunade- sama what're you doing!" an alarmed Shizune came and pulled the little Naruto away. _Sigh. _The perfect chance gone to waste.

"Tsunade- sama how did Naruto escape the rope?" Team 7 were tied back to back or was until Naruto broke out.

"I have to pee." Naruto shouted, jumping from one leg to another, then squeezing both legs together.

"You said that the last time Naruto and ended somehow ripping all my papers instead." Tsunade yelled rubbing her head. All this because of sake. She'd give it u- No WAY, it wasn't the sake's fault but stupid Jiriya's,… taking all her money.

" I want another lollipop." Sakura pouted throwing away the stick. She was tied with her back to Sasuke. Naruto had left but they remained. Tsunade looked at them weirdly. "Why are you still tied"

"I'll get hyper from all the sugar if I untie myself, then I can't be held reliable of my actions.. Say Tsunade - sensei when can we return to normal?" Sakura asked her big eyes widening. She didn't want to be stuck in younger version of herself.

" I don't know. I'm working on it."

"Hn. Well work harder then. This is your fault you know." Sasuke spoke, his voice sounding childish but still managing to sound like his cool older self.

"What did you say midget?" Tsunade eye's flashed. Her fists came closer and closer but then she saw Sakura's face. Arg. Sakura must've turned around the pair so she was facing her teacher instead of her now turned four year old boyfriend. Ah, her student was way too caring.

"Hokage- sama" Sasuke's voice came cool as ever.

"What brat?" she growled

"You need a mint" Sakura gasped. Tsunade roared and Sasuke hned. Tsunade was about to punch him out the building, no Konoha when

"Yo. Sorry I'm late. I was helping a baby cross the street when I fell down the stairs. I got amnesia for 4 hours." Kakashi's eyes closed and a smile appeared under his mask.

"You're the worse liar there ever was Kakashi- sensei." Sakura shouted . Kakashi eyes rose. Funny he heard Sakura's voice but didn't see her.

"Sakura?"

Tsunade pounded him on the head. Kakashi spun around dizzy . " I called you 6 hours ago. And I need you to take care of your team 7."

"Team? But Hokage-sama they're 16 now, not genins."

"I know that. But not for now. You see-"

_Thump_

Naruto had managed to break out of the closet tsuande had managed to stuck him in after tying him up. Tsunade shouted "You got out" while Kakashi screeched. "Mummy." and whimpered. Bad experiences with mummies and all that, you know.

"Kakashi- sensei." He peeked around the hokage's desk to see two figures that looked like a mini Sakura and Sasuke.

"Oh my god! Sasuke and Sakura had kids." He fainted.

_Kick_. Kakashi landed on his head.

_Punch. conscious again._

"These are your students, idiot." Hokage shouted. Then "They just had an accident."

"All because of a dumb Hokage." Sasuke yawned. He was tired of being tired. He wanted some tomatoes, candy, to run around and play and…..great--..

"Why're you guys tied and what do you mean accident?" question marks appeared everywhere, bumping all over the place.

"You see about that incident…." Tsunade grinned sheepishly.

_Flashback_

Tsunade was fast asleep, drool coming down her mouth to plop on the piles of papers she should be doing. She was drunk, very drunk and sleeping during duty hours. All typical, usual things including her shouting in her dreams, swearing vengeance on Jiraiya who'd "stolen" money from her. More like she lost thousands gambling. She made fists, clenching them in and out, imagining it was the perverted Sanin's throat instead.

OUTSIDE

"I'll report to the old granny then." Naruto entered the Hokage's room so he could report about the mission he and the teme had completed. Sasuke turned and went in the opposite direction, where Sakura was surely working on some medical things. They hadn't seen each other for a month to due the mission and so he was going to make up for lost time.

WITH NARUTO

Naruto saw a sleeping, drooling and a mumbling Tsuande. When he went to poke her to wake her up he was grabbed by her monstrous strength. " you think you won Jirayia? Die, die," the Hokage was sleep talking, walking, and squeezing the life out of Naruto, banging him around like a ragged doll.

"Let me go." he gasped and was about to go limp when he was forced to drink a potion that Sakura had been testing before.

"Take that jiria, you perverted bastard. You'll be dead by the time this poison starts working." Evil cackling followed. Naruto in the mean time had fallen asleep.

WITH SAKURA& SASUKE:

Off making out.

5 min. later:

"Did you hear that?" Sasuke looked towards the direction where the evil laughter was coming from. It might be Orchiamuru (sp?) you know, coming to kidnap him for his…lets not get into that now….

"We should check it out." Once inside they found no sign of Naruto ( he was "buried" underneath piles of paper.) and a sleeping Hokage. When Sakura went to poke her sensei awake she too, like Naruto was grabbed. Sakura chocked and tried to move Tsundae's powerful grip. Sasuke was about to attack the Hokage but was stopped by Sakura's protest.

"We can't harm her. She's the Hokage and my teacher and I can't hurt her when she's sleep killing."

" Don't be stupid Sakura. That's a good reason to attack her." Sasuke protested. But while he had been arguing Tsuande took that chance to knock him on the head, making him dizzy. She took that chance to make both of them drink the potion.

"HAHHA. There now you'll never live again. Haahh….a" Tsunade was interrupted by Shizune.

"What did you do?!" She brought out a huge hammer and knocked Tsunade on the head with it. The blond haired lady woke up and started shouting around until she tripped over Sakura's body. She picked up her students body and cried waterfalls.

"Oh my god. Someone killed my dear student. Quick Shizune we have to find who did this." she screeched like a crazy lady. " Why are you just standing there?"

"You did this." They both looked up to see all three of team 7 stirring only to see them glow and then just as fast stopped. huh?

"AHh. What did you do Tsuande-sama. Did you go into one of your rampages again?" The blond haired Sanin didn't answer but gulped instead. Then squealed and hugged her dear student closer. " You're the cutest little girl Sakura." Sasuke and Naruto had waken up as well and thinking Tsunade was still in killing mode they grabbed the hammer and hit the "killer" with it.

" Get away from Sakura." Sasuke and Naruto took their fighting stance and then looked at their pink haired friend.

" Where's Sakura?" Naruto asked and looked at Sasuke. Then punched him shouting 'imposter'. The boys rolled around fighting until they were stopped by the small pink haired girl.

" It's me you guys." Sakura's voice was like a little girls. She looked at her teacher that seemed like a giant compared to her small height. "By looking at Naruto and Sasuke I guess we look about four right Sensei.?" Tsuande woke up and nodded.

Sasuke hating the weak, little body of his 4 year self asked the question they all wanted answered. " So how do we turn back?"

Then "what do you mean you don't know!! You're the stupidest Hokage there ever was." ( enter choking sounds)

END FLASHBACK

" So that's what happened."

"yeah and now you're going to take care of them until I find a way to reverse this" Tsuande waved her hand dismissing him. Then " Make sure to keep a eye on them, especially Naruto. He's the devil incarnated. So don't untie his rope."

"What?" Kakashi looked up from the rope that he had untied while Tsuande was talking. Where was Naruto? He had jumped out the window, wanting to fly and landed on the ground elegantly. Guess they still had some of their ninja skills.

" What're you waiting for, go find him before he ruins the entire village!" Tsuande roared her fists breaking the desk. Kakashi walked lazily away. How much trouble could one little Naruto be?

" We're going over to kakashi- sensei's then." Sakura said excitedly. She couldn't wait to see how kakashi- sensei's house looked and if he had any cute fluffy stuffed animals. She loved them and lots of pink candy. Yep. Sakura grabbed Sasuke's hand and they flew out the building.

Shizune was in the process of cleaning the broken desk when Tsunade asked her a question.

" Hey Shizune did I tell Kakashi that those three will act stupider and more childish as time goes on? Hm…but odd thing about this potion is that somehow they don't forget the most important things to them. Just like Naruto's ramen" She laughed as she fingered the empty potions bottle. Hmm. She'd better get to work but maybe after a bottle of sake…

----------

With Naruto:

Kakashi finally found Naruto at the ramen shop. That was expected but what wasn't was the amount of women all around the ramen shop or more specially around Naruto. Kakashi's eyes popped out of their sockets. His student was getting more attention from women than him…not to mention Naruto was only 4 now. The humiliation…Kakashi deflated and ended up next to Naruto.

"Er.. It's time for you to go home, Naruto." Kakashi stared at all the women around him. Ah, so pretty.

"You must be his dad! You have the cutest son." the woman closest to him said.

"Ahh…wha…no… I mean…" kakashi stuttered. What to say…

" Oh, you must be a great dad to let him eat what he wants and how much." the ladies all crowded around and shouted.

"He's so cute. Must take after his dad." giggles and more giggles.

" And do you see that mask…sooo mysterious." And on and on went on the compliments and Kakashi welcomed all of it except for the huge bill that came.

"WHHHAT!? No way am I paying for that! Naruto you pay for it." Kakashi shouted. He looked for his now-turned- midget student only to see him running away.

"NARUTO!" Kakashi ran full speed and dragged the reluctant little yellow haired boy who was dragging his foot every or trying to seeing as his feet didn't exactly reach the ground. Naruto didn't have any money or coupons left to pay for his bills, so he took his new little self into advantage.

"WAhhh…sob…ahh..son…sniffle." Naruto howled at the sky and managed to squeeze out a single tear to his advantage. Kakashi stopped abruptly and stared at the whimpering child. Whoa he had not been predicting thi-- wait he should've known Naruto would do anything to get out of paying his bills.

"Did you see that?!"

"Yes, I did! He dragged the poor little child and he's demanding that that little boy pay the bills."

"I can't believe this. He wants his own son to pay for what he ate."

" The horrible man. How can you say that to your own child." The ladies shouted their outrage and advanced. Kakashi gave a nervous laughter and backed away slowly. Real slowly.

" Hehe..I never said he was my child."

" what? You stole that child."

"Kidnapper!" a lady fainted at the background.

" Quick get him."

Kakashi's eyes widened "I never said that either. I'm innocent, I tell you."

" That's what his mask is for! A disguise."

"He must be those sick guys that like kids. We can't let him loose." All the once pretty but now crazy ladies picked up any weapon they could find and chased a poor Kakashi who kept screaming his innocence and "Run Naruto".

The ladies hit Kaskashi when they reached him. The ladies carried anything and everything from handbags to parasols to knifes to hammers…. Kakashi ran and Naruto laughed his feet never reaching the ground. Haha indeed Naruto….

END.

Preview of what's next…. 

Sasuke cursed at his tiny body's endurance. Sheesh, he couldn't even carry a teddy bear…granted the bear was bigger than him but still….what had the world come to? He hiked the huge ribbon wearing bear higher and walked out the store or almost did when he saw a pair of shoes in front of him.

" Now where do you think you're going Mr." the bald guy in a suit asked him. He looked straight up and didn't bother to look down.

" Yo, down here dumbass." Sasuke said exasperated. He would've killed the guy by now if he was normal.

"Whoa, what's a little kid like you doing stealing my merchandise?" the guy looked down and frowned confused.

Sasuke merely raised an eyebrow and stared.

AND:

" Sir are these your kids.?" the security guard, who had a long beaky nose asked him. Kakashi stared art the three kids that were the devils apprentices. Yes even the sweet Sakura.

" They did a lot of damage to the store and you're going to have to pay for it." the guy even had a beaky voice. Sasuke struggled in the guys grip and struggled.

"I'm going to do a lot of damage to you idiot if you don't let me down." Sasuke landed a punch to the guys nose sending him flying…crashing into some expensive….cans of Prego soup?

"Emm…. You're going to have to pay for that too." the other guy stared at his colleague.

" I don't know them." Kakashi shook his head furiously. Yep denying was the best way to go.

" But you have to know me…You're my Papa."

Huh????

AN.: the next chap is where Kakashi's tortured even more when they all go SHOPPING. Sasuke gets caught for stealing 0.o and Naruto kills anyone getting close to his carts & carts of Ramen. There's Sas/saku parts in next chap too.

If anyone else did the same plot I haven't read it & hopefully nothing's the same. Review ? Tell me wht you think. R&R Apple Bloss.


	2. Chapter 2

Summary- I don't own Naruto. This is a story about when team 7 turns into little 4 year olds all due to a crazy Hokage and poor Kakashi has to take care of three energetic, hyper kids. Poor Kakashi indeed. Paring sas/sak. And thanks to everyone that reviewed me. I didn't think it would be that good. It makes me feel loved.-- . Hope u enjoy this chap. Review???

"Slow down Sakura." Sasuke shouted as his tiny formed girlfriend ran through the streets, dodging people here and there. People stopped and stared at the cute little girl dragging the slower boy by his hand. They giggled and cooed at how cute the two were, whispering among themselves. Cute? Sasuke defiently did not find this cute. How dare they call him that? He was one of the most powerful ninja's there ever was. And how dare they call his Sakura cute. Well she was but only he was allowed to call her that…only in his thoughts since Uchia's did not speak lovey dovey language,

"C'mon Sasuke-kun" Sakura shook his hands and ran faster, ending up bumping into a lady. The lady was wearing a sunny colored dress (which blinded Sasuke) with those frilly laced umbrellas. She looked at the children and gasped in delight.

"Aren't you just the cutest little kids?" She bent down and touched Sakura's hair and went to pinch Sasuke's cheek. Sasuke glared at the lady and dared her to touch him. The lady must be blind or mega stupid because she still tried to pinch him. Sasuke caught her hand in mid air.

"Don't even think of touching me or you'll end up dead in a sec." Sasuke's voice was cold as ice but still sounded oh so adorable. The lady laughed stupidly as her friend joined them and crouched down.

"You guys are so adorable." She smiled. "What's your sister's name little guy?" The extremely dense lady's friend giggled and patted his head or tried to because her finger was being twisted by the Uchia. Guess they could use their charka when they really needed to. The lady uttered a shriek then giggled nervously.

"Stupid, are you blind? That's not my sister; we look nothing alike, you morons. That's my girlfriend and you'll be dead by tomorrow for saying something that dumb. Forget, I'll just kill you now." Sasuke growled, his fists formed and he punched one powerfully in the face. The lady dropped soundlessly on the street. What can he say they pissed him off. No one messed with him or his Sakura.

"Let's go Sasuke-kun. I'm finished." Sakura ran back to him. Wait a minute…when did she even leave? Sakura carried bunches of tomatoes and a lollipop in her tiny arms. Sasuke's love for her just went up by how many tomatoes she just brought for him. Then he remembered they didn't have any money with them.

"Sakura, how'd you get them without money?" he asked her his eyebrow raised. She grinned mysteriously and just walked on. Sasuke shrugged and followed her.

"Tsunade- sama" Shizune walked in to see the lady Hokage asleep, drool falling all over important papers. Her gaze fell to the large bottle of sake that was now empty. Shizune sighed and closed the door. Guess team 7 had a long wait ahead of them. Poor team 7 indeed. And Kakashi, lets not forget him now.

WITH KAKASHI & NARUTO

"Oh, oh what's that?" Naruto asked standing on tippy toes to touch a glass figure, which he couldn't see because it was high up.

"Don't touch that Naruto." Kakashi snatched the precious glass figure of a woman away. Ah, his precious collection would never survive Naruto. The agony, the anguish, the-

"Oi, Naruto don't touch that!" He snatched away another delicate object. Kakashi looked out the window and wondered where his other two students were. Kakashi put the glass objects in a higher place (how high must they be? Naruto some managed to get everywhere…_sigh)_ when

_Crash. Glass breaking. _

"Oopps, my bad. Hehhee." Naruto laughed nervously. Kakashi ran in the room and howled. His beautiful, mega huge plasma TV, all broken into big chunks of glass. Why, why him???

Sakura and Sasuke walked hand in hand there "borrowed goods" finished. Yes Sakura used the five finger discount but she called it "borrowing" instead.

"We should go to Kakashi's house, now" Sasuke stated and then stopped, when he felt a tug on his hand. Sakura had stopped walking and stared at a store display. There in that store held her most beloved possession or what she wanted to be hers. Sakura stared at it with hearts in her eyes.

"Hn, what're you staring at Sakura. Let's go already." Sasuke looked at Sakura, only to see her spaced out. He shook her and still nothing. Was this a side effect of the potion, if it was that idiot hokage was so getting it.

"Sasuke- kun, look." Sakura whispered and pointed her small finger. Sasuke stared and didn't see anything but a store that had stuffed animals and other such nonsense.

"I love that bear…I want that bear" Sakura squealed and chocked Sasuke in her excitement. But then her eyes dropped and big tears formed in her eyes. The little girl emotions was taking over. Poor Sasuke here didn't know what to do and helplessly looked on. People stopped by and watched the little girl tremble and the boy staring, looking lost and patting the girls head awkwardly. While some came to comfort Sakura, Sasuke ran across the street, interrupting traffic and went straight into the store.

Inside the store he stared at all the cute, fluffy animals and he wanted to puke. So much lovey dovey things made him sick. He looked around until he spotted one that looked bigger than the rest. Sasuke grabbed the huge bear and ran. He put it on his back, piggy back style, and ran. _Sigh_. The things he did for his girlfriend.

Sasuke cursed at his tiny body's endurance. Sheesh he couldn't even carry a teddy bear…granted it was bigger than him but still…what had the world come to? He hiked the huge ribbon wearing bear higher and walked out the store or almost did when he saw a pair of shoes in front of him.

"Now where do you think you're going Mr." the bald guy in a suit asked him. He looked straight up & didn't bother to look down.

"Yo, down here dumbass." Sasuke said exasperated. That guy would've been long dead if he was normal.

"Whoa, what's a little boy like you doing stealing my merchandise?" the guy looked down and frowned confused. In all his 2 days of working here he had never seen a little 4 year steal.

Sasuke merely raised an eyebrow and stared.

"I'm going to have ask you to put that back and have a ninja take you to your parents and everyone have a little chat." The guy shook his head and tsked.

"You can't idiot, my parents are long dead and I won't put this down. It's for my girlfriend. She wants this ugly thing." Sasuke's sounded bored. He went to walk by the guy but was stopped. Ok, now the bald guy was ticking him off.

"Right buddy like I'm going to believe that story." Sasuke's eyes twitched.

" Listen just because you don't have a girl doesn't mean I don't. It's not my fault you're too ugly. I have to go." The guy's eyes widened. A little 4 yr old had just…& was it his fault that he was ugly…& that was the same excuse his wife said when he saw her with someone else. Soo cruel… Sasuke in the mean time looked out the glass door & got an idea.

"Look see over there, that's my girlfriend's mom and she's going to pay for it but she wants it to look like I got the bear for Saku, ok. Go to her and she'll pay you." The guy looked and indeed he saw a lady with a pink haired girl. Hmm maybe the midget was telling the truth. Sasuke had already left and handed the bear to her. Sakura gasped at the huge bear, she could hardly wrap her arms around the whole thing. It was white with a little hat on top and so fluffy. And the most special thing was that there was a heart that said I love you. Ahhh how touching.

Sasuke in the mean time didn't care for touching moments since he grabbed her hand and they ran like the wind. The bald guy in the mean time screamed and chased them but fell on a banana peel and slipped. What a loser.

After a while they stopped and Sakura looked at the heart and she grinned.

"Sasuke-kun this is the best thing ever. And you even got the one that said 'I love you'"Sasuke looked at her blankly. What was she babbling about? He didn't care since the next moment they were kissing. How sweet…at least that's what the people on the sidewalk thought.

" Sooo young and in love. The youthfulness burns with in them." A particular ninja we all know and love but are afraid of because of his fashion sense among other things, cried waterfalls. It was beautiful, indeed it was the youthly love those two young ones shared. Just like the youthly love between his dear Sakura- chan and him. Lee must've not seen the pink hair, how he missed who knows. Lee cried more in happiness. He had to tell his wonderful youthful sensei, Gai.

"Gai-Sensei" Lee ran fast. He had been gone minute away from Gai- sensei, the longest he had been gone away from Gai-sensei. Lee increased his speed, poor thing he shouldn't have done that. Lee tripped over some dumpsters and ended up stuck. Haha that's why they say saw watch your step.

SOMEWHERE OFF IN THE FAR DISTANCE

Gai's Lee senses were tingling. His youthful, handsome Lee was hurt. He had to save him. Yosh, off he went.

"Kakashi?" Sasuke said. He entered the pervert's house and was surprised to see it was neat. Who knew?

"Where were you guys? Don't you know you should never leave me with Naruto?" Kakashi looked crazy. He had stains all over is face and his hair looked worse than usual. There where …. "Where'd you get that huge bear from Sakura?"

"I'm hungry." Naruto shouted and thumped his head on the table.

"No you're not Naruto. You just ate and ruined my kitchen, my bathroom, my TV. my precious glass …. " Kakashi dropped to the floor and wept for his precious collection. Sasuke getting bored just walked out. He found a guest room and dropped dead to the world.

NEXT MORENING.

"We need clothes Kakashi sensei" they where dressed in mini version of kakashi's clothes. They where from when he was a little kid and in kakashi's opinion the best thing in fashion history. Sasuke hated it. There was no Uchia fan on the back and he did NOT want to imitate his teacher like the freaky Lee moron.

"AND grocery. You don't have any Ramen left" Naruto looked at his sensei disapprovingly. What kind if house was this??? Hell, Naruto tells you. His worst nightmare had occurred: a place with no ramen left. Naruto cried silently then burst out his swarrow to the world. Sasuke didn't care so he just pounded Naruto on the head with a spoon.

"We'll go after breakfast." Kakashi looked at the burned oatmeal and gagged. Maybe he could force this down Naruto's throat. The brat seriously deserved it. Who said the devils reincarnation needed a good time in this world??

AT THE STORE:

"Let's go to the clothes store" Sakura tugged on Kakashi's pants. One hand was tucked in Sasuke's and another holding kakashi. If Sakura was with him Sasuke couldn't be that far off.

"No, we'll get the grocery. Or you will and I'll go shop for a new TV." Kakashi walked them in the HUGE store. Naruto ran inside with Sakura shouting at him to stop. She didn't want anyone getting lost.

Kakashi grabbed a cart and they shopped for about a min. before Naruto and Sasuke ran away. They were bored and so they would create mayhem. Oh yea.

"Hey teme look over there." Naruto pointed to an area and one by one they grinned. Yes even the all mighty Uchia.

END

**PREVIEW**

RAMEN. RAMEN. & more Ramen. Naruto was in heaven. He sat in the carts filled with rameny goodness. No one would take it from him. NO ONE!!! He laughed out loud.

"There. There's one of them!" one of the store clerks pointed and three others ran with him straight towards Naruto. He aimed his weapon and grinned

_Bring it on!!_

**AND**

"Here" Sasuke handed her the flame lit match.

"Emm... You need a bigger fire to toast these." Sasuke looked at her, took the match and stomped on it. He drew a big breath and hoped/prayed it worked. And it did, fire balls (small ones) shot out of the little boy's mouth and on to some of the cereal boxes. There, now she had a fire.

Sakura nodded and placed the soft white things over the fire and waited for them to get toasted. She couldn't believe Sasuke never tasted them before. Probably part of his no sugar diet. Well she was changing his mind today.

Four clerks ran up to them and their eyes popped out. They went to grab the little kids while two of them went to get fire extinguishers.

"You put the store on fire." The store clerk boy shouted. "Get out of there now."

"Idiot, shut up, can't you see I'm trying to eat a toasted marshmallow here." Sasuke growled at the boy.

**AND**

"Sir are these your kids?" the security guard, who had a long beaky nose asked him. Kakashi stared art the three kids that were the devils apprentices. Yes even the sweet Sakura.

"They did a lot of damage to the store and you're going to have to pay for it." the guy even had a beaky voice. Sasuke struggled in the guys grip and struggled.

"I'm going to do a lot of damage to you idiot if you don't let me down." Sasuke landed a punch to the guys nose sending him flying…crashing into some expensive….cans of Prego soup?

"Emm…. You're going to have to pay for that too." the other guy stared at his colleague.

I don't know them." Kakashi shook his head furiously. Yep denying was the best way to go.

"But you have to know me…You're my Papa."

Huh????

**AN:** Did I chase away my readers/ reviewrs? ( . I decided to turn the shopping experience into a two or maybe 3 chap thing with more abusing to kakashi. Hehe…he get's even more ambushed nxt chap. Tune in 'k? The last preview's from chap. 1 'cuz I thought I'd put it here but decided to put it up nxt chap. What'd you think of the Sas/Saku part? Hoped u all liked it. Tell me what u think & give me ideas about the shopping incidents that'll occur if you want 2. I'd like that. Tell me what u think **Review???** R&R. Apple Bloss….


	3. Chapter 3

Summary- I don't own Naruto. This is a story about when team 7 turns into little 4 year olds all due to a crazy Hokage and poor Kakashi has to take care of three energetic, hyper kids. Poor Kakashi indeed. Paring sas/sak.

THANKS EVERYONE for reviewing. Loved' em & they sort of made my crappy day better. . Oh, I do agree with them being 4 yr olds and kissing , but they still think with their 16 yr old minds….for now anyhow because their gonna go crazy. Ye-

"Un. What the hell?!" – Author is now unconscious-

"What? She was boring everyone "Sasuke shrugged.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&.

Sasuke couldn't help but let that little smile slip out. Smile? That was no smile. If someone would see him 'smiling' they might think he was a murderer grinning evilly and plotting to kill his next victim.

"Do you see that, dobe?" Sasuke asked the blond as he starred at the item, a single silver item and he would be rich. Rich he tells you. Yes you're saying 'Doesn't he have like loads of money?' well guess what, he wanted MORE. More he tells you. ANYWAYS…

"I see it." Naruto grinned as he pointed to the mop and the yellow cleaning bucket thingy with wheels. Think of all the chaos he could do with it. Naruto laughed until Sasuke hit him on the head.

"Idiot. What the hell are you looking at the mop bucket for? There, look over there." Sasuke pointed at the direction.

"Eh, teme, someone must've forgot their key. We have to report it to the lost and found "Naruto shouted and Sasuke swatted him again.

"No one _lost_ it. It's the key to the cash register. We're going to use it" Sasuke went to the register and tried to reach the key that was in the key hole. Damn his stupid 4 yr old body's height.

"Hehe I guess we need to teach 'em not to leave keys around like that" Naruto went and jumped to get the key and open the cash register. Too bad he didn't reach it either. After 3 min. of trying both boys became frustrated.

"I'll get on your shoulders and then reach the key." Sasuke said and went to climb on Naruto's shoulders. Naruto threw him down and refused. Why couldn't he get on teme's shoulders ? After arguing for 3 more min. Sasuke finally got on Naruto's shoulders.

"Damn teme, you need to loose some weight." Naruto groaned as he weaved left and right.

"Stop moving Naruto" Sasuke tried to remain steady on the other boy's shoulders. Naruto righted himself and then walked towards the register again only to loose his balance. Naruto jerked backwards, forewords, back...for…ba…

_Crash_

_Enter breaking glass… tons of glass_

Naruto and Sasuke stared at the bottles and bottles of broken glass and red liquid. Sasuke blinked and shrugged. He got back on Naruto's shoulders and got to work. He stuffed his pockets with the green cash and laughed like a maniac and Naruto joined. When Sasuke's pockets were full he stuffed some down his shirt.

"HEY, kid what're you doing?!" a guy with a thick neck and huge shoulders shouted. For a huge guy the guy squeaked like a mouse. Sasuke cracked up and pointed at the guy and still somehow managed to stuff some more money down his shirt. The guy came running closer and Naruto's eyes widened.

"Run, teme!!" Naruto yelled and ran with Sasuke still on his shoulders. Sasuke wobbled and screamed at Naruto, his precious money was flying out and the wind was blowing it away. The agony, the loss, the---- Naruto slammed into an aisle that held cleaning things and Sasuke fell off his shoulder. Naruto never noticed and rushed on, screaming his head off. Passer bys watched and wondered where he young boy's parents were. Speaking of parents…err "guardians" in this case….

With Sakura & Kakashi:

Kakashi and Sakura piled up more and more things into their 3rd cart. Kakashi looked at his watch every two seconds and finally couldn't do the shopping anymore. He was dying (insert pic. where he slowly dies inside.)

"Sakura, here take the list and shop. I'm going to go buy another plasma TV and I'll be back soon." Kakashi waved as he disappeared by getting farther and farther, his smile getting wider as he disappeared from the little pink girls sight.

"But…" Sakura uttered staring helplessly. How was she going to move the shopping carts and do everything?? How!! Sakura's little girl instincts took over and her lips wobbled a bit. Her eyes blinked rapidly to hold the tears at bay and she saw a little girl her age enter the aisle. The girl tired to reach something in a high shelf but couldn't manage it. Haha, the girl was having the same problem as her…or was until the girls dad came and helped her get the box of gummy bears.

"Thank you daddy" the black haired, piggy tail wearing girl beamed at her father, who swung the girl into his arms and they laughed away. Interesting, so little girls had daddies. So she must have one as well, huh? So that must mean-

"Hello there my little youthful friend! Do you need any help?" A fuzzy bushy browed thing asked her, waving his, its? hand towards the three carts. Sakura stared and stared her emerald eyes growing larger and larger until she screamed.

She knew there were monsters under her bed and there during the night, if she didn't behave properly but... they were around in the day now too?! The monsters were out to get her; she knew they would get her one day! The green monster beamed a bright light trying to blind her from it's mouth and Sakura's terrified eyes widened. She couldn't die this early. She would kill the thing first. She grabbed the closest thing next to her (a silver pole that was used to bring things from high selves down) and slammed it hard on the ugly beast's bowl cut head. She ran and didn't look back. She had killed one monster, who knew how many were left.

NARUTO:

"AAAAA" NAruto screamed at the top of his lungs. He couldn't find the Ramen section. Where oh where was his precious ramen, his precious ramen (insert background music). Naruto sang lowly under his breath and walked around the same place for the 5th time. Too bad he didn't know that with him being directionally challenged.

"GET BACK HERE!!" great it was the bulky security guard with the squeaky voice…wait it must the guys twin. Yes then there was two. Naruto waited for the guy to come closer grabbed a jar of pickles' and olives then threw them at the guy. Haha, Naruto stuck out his tongue and walked away prettily. The security guy was howling about the raining glass piece stuck in his forehead and swore revenge on the midget. His head was his that is the midget's head was his. The guy limped faster; he had pickles down his pants. How did t get there? Simple it went through his shirt that had a huge whole in it due to the mighty tiny Uchia.

BACK TRACK TO WHEN NARUTO DROPPED SASUKE:

Sasuke glared at the stupid dobe that dropped him on his tiny bottom. Poor Sasuke had a bubo. Yeah right, Sasuke was off running around the aisles looking for his tomatoes and trying to kill the dobe. The stupid store had not tomatoes! Outrageous! Maybe that was because he was looking at the cleaning section but you know he's a prodigy and all or so they say. Sasuke grabbed the items and stared at the bottles of Febreeze, Glades, Clorox, Snuggles and other cleaning products. Che, nothing interesting here until he saw the fine print that said 'flammable object; keep away from fames' or something like that. What caught his attention were the flame and the explosion part.

Sasuke piled all the flammable objects in a pile and lit the match that he had 'found' lying on the floor.

"Stop NOW!!" the alarmed security guy said. He waved his arms in the air and Sasuke just looked at the guy as he let the match go. The guy shouted frantically not knowing what to do.

"Drop on the flames and roll over. It'll put out the flames." Sasuke said in a matter of fact tone, like dropping oneself on a fast spreading fire was an every day thing. The guy too out of it to notice how dangerous the advice was did as Sasuke said. He howled in agony but by some miracle put out the flames and still lived, though his back and clothes was badly burned. The other employees heard the yells and came to investigate and found their colleagues in the mess.

"CLEAN UP IN ALISLE 5" the loud speaker boomed. They ran to the next aisle to see Sasuke playing bowling with bottles of expensive wine.

"CLEAN UP IN 6" They turned to see a maniac blond haired boy riding the mop bucket and knocking off things from the selves and shouting RAMEN.

"Split up" the nodded and grimly left to do their mission.

BACK TO NARUTO AND THE SECURITY GUY:

Naruto ran and looked back. Ha he had lost the freak. He ran around looking for his precious ramen and asked anyone he could find. Then he spotted a familiar pink haired girl and ran up to her.

"Hey Saukra-chan. What're you doing here? Where's kaa-kaa—kk…" Naruto shrugged and didn't attempt to try to say the hard to say name again.

"He left to buy another TV. Say Naru, which one do we need, Catsup or ketchup?" She handed him the two bottles and waited expectantly. Naruto laughed nervously and scratched his head. Bummer a tuff one, how was he supposed to know?

"eh…"

"Get back here!!" they turned around to see store clerks chasing Sasuke who was spraying bug repellent on them. One of the guys caught Sasuke from the back and stuffed him in a sack.

"HEY! You can't do that to my boyfriend" Sakura shouted as she ran after the guys. Naruto never noticed anything since he spotted the love of his life. There in it's all its glory was ramen. He ran fast to get there but was grabbed from the back. He struggled to get free and avoid the sack. Naruto used his little boy's voice and cried out, sobs loud & clear.

"Hey look it's the little adorable kid. And look another kidnapper."

"He must be with the masked one!" The ladies from before came and surrounded the clerk. They pounded him with packs of unopened diaper bags, ketchup bottles, apple juice container, shoes, and a hammer.

"Are you okay little guy?" the ladies cooed and hugged him, making sure there were no bruises. Naruto's 16 year old hormones rushed at him fast and he blushed. Ahh the life.

WITH SASU & SAKU:

"You finished?" Sasuke asked his girlfriend and she nodded. His respect for her went up a notch. She had raged after the people and used her strength, which he guessed worked when she really needed it. They had beaten up the guys (Sasuke sprayed their eyes well with the bug repellent. They were bugs in his eyes, very annoying bugs) and tied them up with a rope. Sasuke locked up the storage room tight and threw the key somewhere.

Sakura grabbed his hand and they walked away. Sasuke turned his head left and right looking for tomatoes. None. Sasuke grabbed a box of cereal and tasted them. Blah, he opened another and another throwing away each.

"Ohh let's take these and we eat them with hot chocolate or go camping or some-"Sakura waved the bag of white fluffy things in his face and Sasuke wondered what they were. Not like he was going to ask though so he merely arched an eyebrow elegantly. Sakura how ever understood and hid a grin. The mighty Uchiha never tasted it before huh? She opened the bag.

"We're going to need a fire to toast these."

Sasuke stared then brought the match and lit it. "Here."

"Emm … you need a bigger fire to toast these." Sasuke looked at her, took the match and stomped on it. He drew a big breath and hoped/prayed it worked and it did, fire balls (small ones) shot out of the little boy's mouth and on to some of the cereal boxes. There, now she had a fire.

Sakura nodded and placed the soft white things over the fire and waited for them to get toasted. She couldn't believe Sasuke never tasted them before. Probably part of his no sugar diet. Well she was changing his mind today.

Four clerks ran up to them and their eyes popped out. What was with these kids and where were their parents? Two of the men ran off to get fire extinguishers and the others tried to get the kids.

"You put the store on fire, again." One of the clerks shouted. The fire was spreading and burning everything on the shelves. "Get away from there NOW."

"Idiot, shut up, can't you see I'm trying to eat toasted marshmallow here." Sasuke growled at the boy. Sakura blew on the nicely toasted marshmallow then handed it to him. Sasuke eyes crinkled and he chewed and chewed and -

"How is it?" Sakura said, exasperated. Sasuke shrugged, not bothering to answer, and drew her away from the fire. The clerks were too busy trying to put out the fire to chase after them. Sasuke picked up a can of hair spray and threw it over his shoulders. The flames just went up another notch.

"Fire in aisle 10. Back up crew needed."

RAMEN. RAMEN. & more Ramen. Naruto was in heaven. He sat in the carts filled with rameny goodness. No one would take it from him. NO ONE!!! He laughed out loud. He had climbed up there and was never getting down.

"There. There's one of them!" one of the store clerks pointed and the three others ran with him straight towards Naruto. He aimed his weapon of destruction and grinned. What were his weapon; the bottles of ketchup and bug repellent and bottles. Bring it on!!

The men charged and Naruto threw the bottles at them. The bottles broke and glass went into some of the crew eyes. They howled and Naruto sprayed ketchup into their burning pupils.

"OHHHAAHh…." Naruto stood up and banged his chest with his tiny fists.

"Oi, Naruto are you trying to act like the monkey you really are or Tarzan. Because if it's Tarzan that my midget, retarded friend is a bad imitation." Kakashi smiled his face buried in his book.

"Ka…..KASHI! Where have you been?" Kakashi raised an eyebrow. Who the hell was Kashi and if Naruto was calling him that he was so-

"Look the little boys bleeding! Quick." The ladies from before came to check on Naruto, who must've sprayed some ketchup on himself. They fussed over him and Kakashi pouted.

"Why am I not getting any special attention?" he asked. The ladies turned on him and murder would soon be committed.

"You did this and you harmed him" the ladies rounded on kakashi and beat him to the pulp…once they caught up to him that is.

END

_**PREVEIW:**_

"You"

Sasuke stared at the guy from the teddy bear store. He stared and stared.

"You're so dead midget." The guy growled his voice filled with contempt.

Sasuke yawned and shrugged. Was he supposed to be scared?

_**AND**_

Sasuke drew back his fist and punched the guy in the face. Okay it wasn't a guy but a little kid but he deserved it . The boy cried out and his mother rushed over.

"Young man how dare-----"Sasuke tuned her out before she even began talking.

_**AND**_

Naruto stared hard at the truck. The ice cream truck to be sure. He wanted every single one there was in there.

"Kid you need money. How many times have I told you that?!" the guy frustarade and went to shoo away Naruto, again.

Money, huh?

AN: this chap was long so I didn't finish the shopping incident but it'll defiantly finish early the nxt chap. The nxt chap. takes place in a PARK and more chaos happens. Hope I didn't bore anyone. Tell me wht u think. **_REVEIW??_**


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: I had an interview so I couldn't update earlier. --. I'm surprised i didn't trip with those high heels.--. Hopefully everyone enjoys this chap. REVIEW? I don't own Naruto.

Review?

"I hate you Naruto" Kakashi muttered. He was bruised, he tells you, all because of some crazy ladies. "Where's Sasuke and Sakura?" Naruto just gave him a foxy grin and hugged his ramen cart closer.

"Sir, are these your kids?" the security guard, who had a long beaky nose asked him. Kakashi stared at the three kids that were the devils apprentices. Yes even the sweet Sakura.

"They did a lot of damage to the store and you're going to have to pay for it." the guy even had a beaky voice. Sasuke struggled in the guys grip and struggled harder with each wiggle.

"I'm going to do a lot of damage to you idiot, if you don't let me down." Sasuke growled & landed a punch to the guy's nose sending him flying…crashing into some expensive….cans of Prego soup?

"Emm…. You're going to have to pay for that too." the other guy stared at his colleague. He was just lying there. Was he dead?

"I don't know them." Kakashi shook his head furiously. Yep denying was the best way to go. He was not about to pay for all that damage. No way in hell.

"But you have to know me…You're my Papa." Sakura ran and hugged Kakashi's leg. His eyes widened and he shook his foot furiously trying to get rid of the tiny, laughing girl. Yea, Sakura thought her 'papa' was playing a game with her.

"No I'm not your papa. Hell no!" Kakashi shook his head and shouted. People stared and frowned disapprovingly. Like he cared, he was being called a 'papa'! Naruto and Sasuke stared at their sensei blinking every once in a while. They didn't particularly care unless they had to pay...speaking of which, Sasuke still had most of the money. Haha, the store was getting robbed. Sasuke cracked up inside but then frowned when he saw his girlfriend's lips tremble and her emerald eyes fill with tears.

"oi, stop making her cry,sensei." Sasuke glared and glared harder for a good measure, since he didn't want to appear cute looking. The store clerk looked at the boy and giggled.

_Punch._

Che, he shouldn't have done that. Sasuke thought as the guy landed on top of his fallen comrade.

"See I'm your sensei NOT your dad." Kakashi yelled louder.

"But..but that little girl had a dad so you HAVE to be mines. Your the only one old enough." Sakura stated and glared. He was her father damn it and if he wasn't he had better act like it or else...

Sasuke went and hugged his smaller girlfriend, something he normally wouldn't do and he never would. In the process he managed to stuff a large amount of the money in her pockets.( remember their wearing kiddy version of Kashi's clothes)Gosh he loved his thinking habits and evilness. Naruto just piled up more ramen in his ramen cart.

"This is all nice...NOT. I want you to pay for ALL the damages those demons from hell caused." the manager pointed behind him where there were merchandise opened everywhere, a fire still going on, dead employees, glass, etc... Naruto heard this and stormed over to the guy and poked his fat belly.

"I AM NOT." Naruto sounded deeply insulted. "I just exercise more than you"

Kakashi tugged Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto closer to him and laughed brokenly. The manager looked at him and Kakashi waved his hand.

_Poof_ . He had dissipated from the supermarket and puffed over to his house. Kakashi sighed heavily. God life was suddenly so difficult. Damn the little hellions. Speaking of which---

"DAMN YOU NARUTO!" Kakashi did a nose dive and managed to save on of his precious glass figurine. Too bad he couldn't save the other 5 that came tumbling done. Naruto grinned from his perch on the closet top self.

6666666666

AT THE PARK:

"I hate the park." Sasuke said matter factly. He hated all the laughter, the happiness. He didn't want to play kid games. He was 16 for pete's sake.

"I don't wanna be here. I want my ramen." Naruto wined and tears fell like a river. His baby ramen, all alone left in the store, never to be eaten again. Naruto howled even louder. Sakura felt bad for Naruto and patted him on the head.

"Do you want to blow your nose Naruto?" She asked sweetly. Naruto nodded and blew his nose loudly on the bear's ribbon...the bear that Sasuke had 'brought' for her.

"Idiot" Sakura shouted and pounded him. She stomped off and ran over to the swings.

"Well I'm off to buy some food now" Kakashi walked off lazily.

"Hey teme what should we play?!" Naruto yelled all excited and hyper. Said teme was nowhere to be found.

7777777770

"Ne, let's play house Sasuke-kun. The bear can be the baby" Sakura squealed and hugged the ugly (in Sasuke's opinion) bear. He shuddered at her words. That had to be the most girlish and idiotic game he had ever heard of. So why was it that he was now acting the part of a husband coming home...sigh. Life sucked.

"Sakura I'm home" Sasuke said in a n emotionless voice. He must think of something else damnit, the game was killing him. That reminds of Itachi and ---

"NO SASUKE-KUN! How many times do i have to tell you, you HAVE to sound happy. Do it AGAIN." Sakura boomed and fumed at her stubborn boyfriend as she dropped dozens of green clinging vines. Sasuke just sighed deeply and gloomily left the 'house' or better known as the place under the slides.

"Oi Naruto wanna play house with Sakura?" Sasuke asked Naruto trying not let hopefulness slip into his voice. If the dobe did his part he would be free. FREE. Sasuke cackled and Naruto stared at him.

"Yea" Naruto headed straight for the 'house',super duper happy that he would be Sakura's husband. Sasuke in the mean time yelled his happiness and ran form the evil house.

"Where's Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked Naruto when her 'husband' refused to resurface.

"Hey died in a banana peel accident, so now I'll be your husband" Naruto grinned and did a 'elegant' pose.

Sakura was not pleased by this. She was so hunting down her run-away-groom. Where is the tiny Uchia?

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!l

WITH SASUKE

He walked quickly but not trying to make his escape oblivious. His face was void of emotions like his older self...only he looked so adorable. So adorable that parents came up to touch his face and coo about how cute he was. Of course they were forced to depart once Sasuke coldly, non-politely told them get their ass far away from him.

Sasuke walked aimlessly until he heard someone step up to him. He looked up and low an behold it was the loser from the crappy girly bear store.

"You are dead, midget. You humiliated me for the last time." the guy pounded one fist into another. He grinned and Sasuke gagged. The guy needed a new dental plan.

"Am I supposed to be sacred of you?" Sasuke yawned and looked at him with droopy eyes. The guy's eyes twitched and Sasuke just stared...and stared, not even bothering to blink.

"You think you're a wise guy, eh?" the guy went to punch Sasuke who just easily backed away and dodged the pathetically inaccurate throws. Sasuke jumped on top of a tree and broke of a branch. He jumped off & landed on the guys head.

"Get off me midget" the guy screeched and swayed once Sasuke covered his eyes. Sasuke grabbed the branch and hit the guy with it. He jumped off to the ground and chased the guy around the park hitting the guy's butt since that's how high Sasuke could hit. Sasuke cackled madly as he drove the guy into a pond. He picked up a near by shovel and got to work...which was smacking the guy on the head with said shovel. Sasuke pounded him flat then went to drown him under water by piling dirt all over the terrified man.

WITH SAKU:

When Sakura heard the evil cackling she knew Sasuke had gone over the top. Did he have his daily rations of healthy food and his tomatoes? Surly he found some at the store? Sakura followed the laughter and frowned.

"Sasuke-Kun!" she shouted. Sasuke with his hands lifting the much heavier shovel in the air, froze. Damn the guy was fully buried except for his head. Why oh why did she have to come now? Sasuke howled out loud, a howl filled with anguish. Little Sakura flinched with the heart felt howl.

"Don't kill him Sasuke-kun" Sakura took the shovel and started to remove the dirt. Sasuke refused to help and went of to sulk in his emo pond. He saw a chipmunk come next to him offering nuts. Sasuke took out his anger on it by squeezing it painfully to death.

The guy fell on his knees and kissed the ground...he was aiming for Sakura's foot except Sasuke pulled her away at the last second. He didn't want Sakura contaminated.

"Thank you. Thank you." The guy wept. "I'll do anything to repay you from helping away from that murderer." he pointed towards Sasuke, who just raised an eyebrow.

"I'm not a murder yet...i still have to kill Itachi, that fucking bastard." Sasuke swore, hatred took over his eyes and he stabbed an innocent pigeon next to him.

"Eh, you can repay me by coming to play tea party." Sakura clapped her hands and jumped up, down, up..

"Sakura don't try to defy gravity." Sasuke pulled her next to him rtied to still her jumping. How was she this hyper, always? Sasuke turned and walked away...er tried to since Sakura grabbed his shirt and pulled him back forcefully.

"DON'T even think about walking away Sasuke Uchia. I had to search you all this time. Naruto's waiting and we will ALL play. Understand?" Sakura said softly but with malice. The guy widened his eyes. Who the hell were these kids? And that pinky looked scary now. He was a softy man that dressed as BOB the Builder for Halloween for goodness sake. This wasn't good for his feeble heart.

"C'mon." Sakura clasped Sasuke's hands in hers and waved the guy in front of them. This was going to be great...so why was she dragging the shovel behind with her?

WITH KAKASHI:

Right after he had ditched the devil's spawns Kakashi had walked over to the grocery store far from the previous one. Speaking of which, it was shut down and they where hunting down said man for the money since their insurance could never cover that much. They had hired a certain ninja we know to hunt Kakashi down. Not that he cared since he never intended to pay the money...willingly.

Kakashi seriously was headed towards the food store when--

" Oh my fruitcake from hell The latest COME COME Paradise is here and it has a bonus book inside." kakashi squealed and ran in, punching a shopper who he thought was trying to get his book.

1 HOUR LATER:

Kakashi walked out with 5 other books and laughed at his good fortune.

"Kakashi" he turned towards the shriek and winced. Man that was almost as annoying as Naruto. He shrugged and went to walk away.

"Damnit wait you idiot." Eh,guess he couldn't walk away. Anko walked up and glared at him.

"I called out to you & you still kept on walking" she growled. " Eh, remember you said you owe me one?"

No he didn't remember ever saying that.

"Good because there's a party for all the senseis day after tomowrrow & you're taking me." Anko said firmly and took kakashi's silence as approval. She went to leave when kakashi called out.

"Oi, think you can do me another favor. Buy some 4 yr old clorthes for 2 boys & a girl." He smiled and his eyes crinkled. When she opened her mouth kakashi interupted. "Don't ask."

Great now he had a 'date'?

END

_**PREVIEW**_

Sasuke grinned evilly as he dropped more mud and stones into the cup.

"drink the tea." Sakura said sweetly to the bear guy. He shook his head fast. Sasuke just thumped him on the back and forced him to. The guy chocked and spit the mud. Too bad he ended up spitting broken teeth parts...which flew on Sakura's face. She was not a happy girl.

**AND**

Naruto laughed wildly as he sat harder on the gas petal. Too bad he couldn't see the window. He must've crushed a lot of things... He just laughed all the more. Ah that's what the ice-cream man got for denying him the cold goodness. Yea, he had stolen the entire truck.

Naruto laughed with abandon and just as quickly his laughter was stopped by a loud crash.

Ah crap.

A/N: It was a late update & I'm sorry for that. Since we're seeing so little of kakashi there'll be more parts dedicated to him...hopefully. Anyways, I have this other story I'm going to be posting soon. It's called OUR UNDISCOVERED SECRET, sasu/saku & it's humor too. Watch out for it & review it? Tell me what you think & REVIEW?? -AppleBloss.


	5. Chapter 5

AN: today was the most worst day in history so i just took time off to write this. Hopefully it comes out nice and makes me calmer. Life can be so ...Enjoy &** review? **Um, i don't own Naruto.

N A R U T O

"Naruto stop that. It's fake tea not real tea and sand is not tea." Sakura sighed for the tenth time and plucked the tea cup from Naruto's mouth. Sheesh how many times had he chocked on the dirt, spit it out, declared it horrendous then just tried it after 2 min., again Sasuke blew at the feather that kept falling over his eye, wishing he could rip it to pieces then stomp on the fake ostrich feather, brightly red hat. Gah, the color made him blind.

"Sakura where did you get all these useless, crappy junk from?" Sasuke asked, waving the tea cup-which happened to look very expensive.

"I borrowed it from the lady sitting on the bench." Sasuke assumed her idea of borrowing resulted in not asking for it in the first place. Sakura glanced at it and then continued to place the ivy, clinging vines in the middle of the 'table' or better known as a large rock. Naruto reached for it but was stopped by Sakura's fist.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to touch anything unless I offer it to you?" She ground out, too busy to notice Sasuke getting up and picking up the shovel. Sakura continued to at Naruto who decided on using her bear to wash his dirt filled hands while Sasuke pounded the 'bear guy' on the head. The guy howled with pain or was about to since Sasuke quickly grabbed a silk scarf and gagged the guy. The poor man chocked and wiggled desperately only to fall on a large rock and skipping joyfully into oblivion. Sasuke laughed and then tried to bury the guy again this time with dirt. He patted the ground( this time he did the head first) with shovel and grinned. Life is great-make that was. The dobe had landed on the 'corpse' and was digging it shouting "TREASURE.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" Naruto screamed when he saw a man with his eyes wide open. Sakura came and peered at the guy. She frowned disapprovingly then shook her head.

"Here have some tea. It'll calm you down." Sakura said, but any intelligent person knew the meaning behind those word : 'Don't even think about messing up my tea party or ELSE". The bear guy trembled and went back to his seat. Sakura grabbed the gag and tied it around his neck, a little to snug if you ask him.

"There." Sakura nodded her approval but Sasuke disagreed. He squeezed the scarf tighter until the guy turned purple and gagged. He grinned all the while and Naruto tried to stuff some bugs down the innocent man's horrified mouth.

"Naruto, Sasuke-kun stop trying to kill our guest." She shouted helping the man. He tired to kiss the midget pink haired girl's feet for saving her life. Sasuke dragged his girlfriend away before she become in contact with the bug that was walking around the guy's neck.

"Have some tea and cookies they'll make you feel better." Sakura gestured to the 'empty' tea cup in front of him. Since Sakura sat opposite the man she had no idea what was inside. But Naruto and Sasuke did. They had filled it with rocks and mud. The guy turned queasy when he thought he saw movement in the mud.

"Go ahead drink it." Sasuke thumped him hard on the back.

"Drink the tea." Sakura said sweetly scratching her arms while rearranging the 'flowers'. Um, maybe they should check out what that plant really is... The guy shook his head violently but Sasuke just forced him to drink it. The guy chocked and spit it straight out and on Sakura's face. She slowly put down the ivy and walked towards the guy.

"OMG GOD!!STOP HER." the guy screeched in agony as Sakura grabbed the shovel and beat him with it. Where? The place where the sun will never shine for the poor man again. Sasuke and Naruto winced and walked away slowly .Ok Naruto did that while Sasuke cheered Sakura on. _Silently._

"Give me the strawberry one with chocolate and vanilla and lots of sprinkles. Don't forget to give me the strawberry shortcake one and the ramen flavor one. NEVER forget that one."

"kid how many times am I goin' to have to tell you that you need money. You don't have none." the guy behind the ice-cream truck grumbled loudly and shouted NEXT.

To bad Naruto wasn't budging. "I want those ice-cream NOW."

"Go get some money."

Money huh?

"Can I have some money please." Naruto gave the person the biggest tear jerking face he could manage. He should've tried it on a lady instead of an old man that could barely hear. He thought Naruto wanted some honey so was on his way to wrestle it from some bears. Ever heard of a store?

"What're you doing dobe?" Sasuke hned his hands fisted in his pockets. He listened then sighed boredly.

"This is how you do it Naruto." Sasuke walked up to a little kid. "Give me whatever the hell you got or else." he threated icily. The kid whimpered and backed out. The mighty Uchiha mad at being disrespected punched the kid in his gut. The mother screamed and came rushing over and shouted at him franticly patting her kid.

"Oi, lady he'll wake up in a hour." Naruto assured her as Sasuke and he made a run for it. Why? All the people had circled around the kid leaving their bags unguarded. Sasuke laughed inside with glee and stuffed everything faster. Naruto screamed with frustration since he had holes in his pockets and all the money slipped out. So as a last resort he stuffed them in Teme's pockets.

"That's enough teme let's get the ice-creams" Naruto pumped his fist in the air.

"No i changed my mind. Besides i hate sweets." Sasuke walked away but then was flattened by the other boy.

"Give me mines then"

"No the moneys all mine" The boys got into a fist fight almost killing each other. Where was Sakura when you needed her..No, seriously where was she?

WITH SAKURA:

"You can't do this to me! I'm the Hokage's student. She'll kill you for this.!"Sakura shouted at the men surrounding her.

"Yea sure kid and I have purple hair with birds pecking on it." the officer sarcastically said. Until his fellow comrade spoke up.

"Eh, chief you do have purple hair and those humming bees are trying to build a nest in your hair."

"Dumbass." Sakura muttered. "I'm a ninja while you're just park cops to keep the park safe. You can't arrest me."

"We just did." the purple haired park cop(0.o?) exclaimed with glee gesturing to her restrained hands. "Er... pink haired girl you're being arrested for attempted murder for that guy lying over there." He indicated to the teddy bear man that had saliva dripping from his mouth, blood pouring from his nose, hands at an odd angle...

"But I'm just a little girl." Sakura smile and gave the adorable eye look. The officers felt bad and almost let her free. Almost. They cried loudly as they dragged her off to jail

"SASUKE-KUN! NARUTO! PAPA! HELP ME!!"Sakura screamed as they dragged her away."PAPA!"

**WITH NARUTO:**

"Stupid selfish teme." Naruto muttered darkly. He groaned as his tummy grumbled loudly. How long were they in this stupid park?

"I'm sorry" he whimpered to his stomach. Tears fell rapidly down his tiny cheeks. Poor boy, he was seriously hungry...not for long though since he just got an idea.

222222222----22222

**WITH THE TEME"**

Sasuke was proud of himself .He probably 'made' at least 2 hundred bucks...But he was tired and wanted to crash which is why he's looking for Sakura. He wasn't going to search for the dobe because a dobe-less world was the world he preferred. But where the hell was his loud, always emotional, tiny girlfriend?

33333334444444

**WITH KAKASHI:**

"Heehe...he" Kakashi giggled quietly to himself as he flipped through yet another page. He was too absorbed in his book to realize it was passed time to pick up the 'devil's brats' and that he hadn't eaten a bite. Hey, at least he remembered to do the grocery. He now had enough food to last him months...weeks now that Naruto was here.

Tap

tap

BOOM... Kakashi jerked his head towards the door. Damn were the devil's assistants here already? He groaned as he went to open the door. His groan went even deeper when he saw who it was.

NARUTONARUTONARUTO

"Hey buddy I just saw some guy speaking to your daughter." Naruto stood on his tippy toes as he spoke to the ice-cream man.

"WHAT!!" the guy shouted with fury and wnet off in a huff in some random direction. Naruto cackled as he went into the tuck and stared it. He couldn't possibly stay there since the guy might come flying back any moment. The truck started to move and people scrammed out of the way.

Naruto cursed his tiny size this time since it would be hard to drive and then brighten up because he was struck with another idea.

**WITH THE ice-cream man?:**

"Noooo, my precious daughter. I'll kill that bastard even talking to her." the guy rambled on until he stopped suddenly. Wait a mintue...he didn't even have a daughter...hell he was just married for 2 weeks. That brat he was so dead... The ice-cream man looked to see a truck heading straight for him and dove out of the way.

"That's my TRUCK." the guy shouted in agony as he saw his beacutiful ice-cream truck fly past people. He ran after it.

**WITH NARUTO:**

Naruto laughed wildly as he sat harder on the gas petal. Too bad he couldn't see the window but he _was_ moving fast. He must've crushed a lot of things, he thought as the truck bumped along... He just laughed wickedly all the more.

Ah, that's what the ice-cream man got for denying him the cold goodness. Yea, he had stolen the entire truck. Naruto laughed with abandon and just as quickly his laughter was stopped by a loud crash.

Ah crap.

The truck stopped all of a sudden and Naruto climbed on the seat to investigate. Ah...the truck had crashed into a large tree and knocked it over. The front of the truck was bashed in and the tree was now crooked. Naruto just sat there thinking what a wicked ride he had and how the teme could never beat that. Shouldn't he think about how lucky he was not have died? Guess not since was rolling around and clutching his stomach and laughing like a maniac. That did stop when the door opened and the ice-cream man, a guy with purple hair, and other people stood over him.

Naruto sobered up and looked gravely at them. "The teme did it."

**WITH SAKURA:**

She scratched her hands then her face, her legs. The prison sucked and she had been itching the whole day. Was it something she touched int the park?

**WITH SASUKE:**

Maybe she had gone to Kakashi's? Sasuke walked there his hands in his pocket, his customary emotion less face there

END:

**PREVIEW:**

Kakashi cringed at what he saw. Those were the most hideous things he ever saw. The color and designs were so babyish and ...blah. Haha that's what the brats get. He couldn't wait to see their faces. It would make his day.

AND:

Sakura found something in her pocket and her face lit up. Yes! Now she could leave the stupid prison, She scratched her hands furiously while laughing.

A/N: Sorry for the way late update. Hope you all like it and REVIEW? I'll try &update faster nxt time. REVIEW...AppleBloss.


	6. Chapter 6

AN: Since I'm in such an upbeat mood I decided to update. . Last chap. was short so hopefully this is longer. Sorry for another very late update. / Enjoy & **review? ** !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"How many times do I have to tell you the teme made me do it?" Naruto blew his breath in exasperation. The stupid park cops had arrested him and was now taking him to who knows where. This is how it happened.

_**FLASHBACK:**_

" Put your hands behind your back, midget man." The purple haired cop said. Naruto refused to listen and reached for the ice cream. A hand popped out a swatted his wandering hand away. The ice-cream man in the mean time was crying over his busted truck.

"what am i going to tell my wife? She'll leave me" He howled. Uh, if anyone was to look behind them, they can see his wife with another guy who liked spandex clothes...

"Blond boy you're being arrested for destroying the most wonderful gift on earth for mankind: ice-cream." The cops dragged a frantic Naruto and went to put the handcuffs on him. Only to have it fall right of.

"Uh, chief I think we need smaller handcuffs." The purple haired chief nodded and tied him up mummy style with rope.

"That should keep the brat all tied up." The chief laughed all the way to the station at his corny joke.

_**END FLASHBACK**_

"Get the teme you retarded, cops. He's the real culprit" Naruto protested wiggling frantically all the way to the jail. The cop laughed and dumped him in jail cell. Sakura turned around hearing a noise. Sakura glanced at the brown wiggling object that seemed to be making some odd gagging sounds. The little girl in her whimpered and stepped back, itching her foot at the same time. She did not have good experiences with mummies. All because of a certain Halloween day when she was 4 years old.

FLASH BACK TO _THAT_ HALLOWEEN:

Sakura grinned widely, so wide it even hurt her mouth. But she didn't care since she was having the best Halloween ever in her entire life...her 4 years alive.

"Sakura honey what happened?" her mother knelt next to her as Sakura twirled around.

"Isn't it great mommy? Ino made wings for me for my fairy costume" Sakura's mother stifled her laughter. Her daughter was wrapped up like a mummy by the 'wings' which covered her blue fairy costume. She went to unwrap her daughter but Sakura refused. They continued to trick or treat.

"Trick or treat." Sakura grinned sweetly at the boy, who just stared at her blinking once in a blue moon. "Why aren't you wearing a costume" She asked curiously but then frowned deeply at the treats the boy was giving her.

"Hey these aren't candy! It's..." she frowned looking at the boy.

"It's vegetables and fruits. Instead of rotting your teeth you should eat healthy food. And dressing up is for babies." The boy slammed the door on her face. Sakura stuck out her tongue and skipped away when she heard voices.

"Sasuke have you been giving people veggies again?"

"You haven't have you? Really then why do we have all these candies. So you eat them yourself huh? Thought so" Sakura grinned hearing all this. Ha the meanie boy deserved all that scoldings.

Sakura skipped along with her mother but then stopped to pick up some candies she dropped, which had scattered around. Sakura glanced up to see her mother gone.

"Mommy?" She glanced this way and that with no sign of her mother. It was dark and every little noise seemed to be magnified 100x more. She took baby steps backwards then started to run towards a random direction until she bumped into something. Horrified she looked up to see it was a tree but then what she thought was tree wasn't.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" She screamed rattled and gasping.

"HMMPFF" it said and tired to run her over. What it was really trying to do was go around her but Sakura was trying to run through it. Both struggled and Sakura steeped on it's wrappings and the mummy stepped on hers. Both mummies were tangled and fought each other for their lives.

"MOMMY! THE MUMMY'S TRYING TO KIDNAP ME!!" Sakura screamed to the full moon. What a night for the full moon to be out and hidden behind those big trees to...

"HMPHMPPh" the mummy screeched. Finally the mummy stepped on his opponent and watched in horror as the other smaller mummy unraveled

"AHHHH" he screamed as the mummy unraveled and then...there was nothing. NOTHING. He screamed in a high pitched girly voice that awoke a dog who howled to the ...moon?

That night the older, taller mummy dreamt of the smaller mummy unraveling, and unraveling, and unraveling and...

"AHHHH" Hatake Kakashi woke up screaming, his body drenched in sweat. Damn the other mummy, whoever it was. The wind howled and his windows banged. Hatake whimpered and covered his eyes. He could've sworn he saw a mummy standing there, waiting for him, unraveling...

END FLASHBACK

U.u U.U I-I

Sakura took a deep breath and approached the figure repeatedly attacking it with her charka filled hands.

"OWWW" the figure groaned and withered with agony and she instantly recognized the blue eyes.

"NARUTO! I'm so sorry." She untied his mummified body. "What happened?"

"The teme set me up and the cops arrested me." Naruto complained then frowned with worry when he saw all the red spots all over her. "Did they harm you Sakura-chan? I'll kill them!" Naruto went to a mode and started to punch the walls.

"Say why don't we just break the wall and leave?"

"We can't. I tired but they catch you and they give you the worst punishment on earth. They ---" Too late Naruto had already broken out.

S&S SAS/SAKU S&S SAS/SAKU

Sasuke walked around aimlessly knowing he should check inside Kakashi's house but he still wanted to make sure she wasn't around shopping or something. Nope no where around. His emotionless turned into a small frown. What if Itachi had gotten hold of her to get to Naruto or him. Sasuke's face turned into a sinister grin. Yes that would be great! He would chop Itachi into pieces, string him in a fishing pole, burn his body, dissect him alive...the possibilities were endless. The evil grin got wider and wider finally bordering on the little sanity left in him. Sasuke walked on laughing like a psycho until he bumped into a Sakura tree.

"Stupid Sakura trees always getting in the wa----" he muttered then froze in place. Stupid Itachi making him forget about hunting Sakura down. Another reason why Itachi had to die. DIE!!!HAHaaa Sasuke laughed all the way to Kakashi's. Silently...his laughter that is.

**WITH Our Ever loving KAKASHI:**

"Hello...Anko" Then "Bye Anko" Kakashi tried to slam the door on her face but she blocked it, getting inside. Anko's eyebrows twitched in annoyance.

"That was not even remotely funny Hatake" she said in exasperation. Then growled when the dense man refused to even acknowledge her, continuing with his ever perverted book.

"I brought you the clothes" Anko held up the bags and took the clothes out. Kakashi looked at them and cringed. No way in hell would any one voluntarily wear clothes like that. There were colors like mud brown, brightly orange with pink bunnies, Teletubbies, Barney, ducks in a bath tub in one neon colored t-shirt, another of...a nude guy wearing a skirt. OMG. That wasn't for little kids and did he mention his delicate, innocent eyes?

"Oi, Kakashi what's wrong with you?" Anko knelt by his side and plucked the twitching masked man and placed his head on her lap. Kakashi groaned as he slowly opened his eyes and saw Anko staring at him. He grinned sloppily, thinking her face was much better than Barney's and ...he shuddered.

"Where'd you get all those crappy clothes from?" Maybe he shouldn't have said that because Anko's eye's narrowed sharply and he was flipped around.

"Ouch" he groaned as he hit the wall. Anko's eyes flashed as she loomed over him. "I have bad taste do I?" She went to grab him again only to have him poof away. This continued for awhile until they were to worn out. He glanced at the clothes and thought of the similar look his mini-students would have. Heh, now that he thought about it, they would never wear things like that and show their faces in public again. But since they didn't have anything else they would have to. Kakashi laughed out loud with glee as he thought of their tortured faces. Yup, Sasuke would get the clown faced one in bright pink and orange, Naruto would wear the purple Teletubby one and Sakura...He laughed until Anko called out to him. As soon as he turned around he got a nosebleed. Ok when had Anko changed and worn that black dress that clung like a second skin. She had very good tastes in clothes.

"Kakashi" Anko inched closer and he nodded his head with approval, his mind in heaven. "You like this dress, huh?" Another sappy grin and furious head shaking were the only response from the besotted ninja. Anko and Kakashi drew closer.

Closer, closer and... 1 inch apart when...

"yo Kakashi" the door banged open and the two teachers flung to the other side of the room. A miniature form of Sasuke looked at them with open blankness. His face was set in the customary way but Anko's wasn't .She was scowling deeply. Damn the brat for interfering.

"Have you seen Sakura? The dope?" Sasuke walked over to the room and sat on top of the clothes. Who the hell had brought all these colorful clothes? They made him fuckin' blind.

"Eh no." Kakashi coughed.

"You better find her soon, you know. You're supposed to be our guardians. Find her soon. I've looked everywhere." Sasuke said with no scowling, hatred, or anything except blankness. Funny how that made it seem all the more threatening.

T.T T.T

Sakura shuddered and scratched behind her ears, neck, and back. Damn scratching. When had it started?

"NOOOOOOOO. STOPPP. I BEG you!!" Sakura cringed and tried to stay strong. Poor dear Naruto. They had captured him and was tormenting him. Sakura whimpered as she heard another whimper come from Naruto. It was as if his pain had become hers. Another series of scratching led Sakura to feel a lump in her pockets. Huh? She took the contents out and poured it in her tiny arms. YES, now she could leave. Say though how had the money ended up in her pockets.

FLASHBACK:

Sasuke went and hugged his smaller girlfriend, something he normally wouldn't do and he never would. In the process he managed to stuff a large amount of the money in her pockets.( remember their wearing kiddy version of Kakashi's clothes)Gosh he loved his thinking habits and evilness. Naruto just piled up more ramen in his ramen cart.

End FLASHBACK:

Yea, Sasuke-kun had slipped into her pockets after he had stuffed all of his. Sakura sweat dropped and made a mental note to get her boyfriend to stop robbing other people's money. Um, will someone remind her of her so called 'borrowing' that only Sasuke seems to be aware of?

Sakura quickly counted the money but then her smile disappeared. She only had money for one person and she couldn't leave Naruto like this. She sighed and winced harder as Naruto screamed and her back started to itch. Life was so complicated all of a sudden. Say where was her darling papa? He should be here for her now.

"Let's go pinky." the cop looked at her meanly. Sakura gulped. "Is my papa here?"

"Nope. We're going to take you somewhere special, where little 4 year olds like you have never and won't ever go." the guy laughed and Sakura screamed., hanging on to the jail bars as the guy tried to pry her away.

"PAPA!! PAPA DARLING COME SAFE ME." Sakura screamed louder.

_WITH NARUTo:_

"Please stop." he whimpered, his head hanging low. Then he heard Sakura's screams and his blood started to boil. No one was going to torture Sakura when he was alive. Naruto worked harder and with more determination until it started again.

"STOP IT!!" He screeched. He stared at the t.v. Screen his mind melting into mush. How did they expect him to live? HOW!?

END-

PREVIEW:

Sakura stared in mute horror. They couldn't do this to her. She was after all a little 4 year old. Her life was ruined and there would be pictures to prove it. She couldn't believe this.

"WAHHH" Sakura's eyes widened and her adorable baby little face scrunched up. Big fat tears poured down her chubby cheeks and the officers cried with her as well.

"We're deeply, truly sorry but we must do this." Sakura didn't hear and cried louder. That won't last much longer since her anger's brewing right underneath the surface.

"We're sorry but say cheese for your mugshot."

---AND

" Let them go" Sasuke stated flatly.

"We can if you give the required amount of money for their bail" the cop explained for the tenth time. Sasuke again ignored it. Oh how he wanted his powers from his normal self.

"No"

"then they can't go" Sasuke stared and wondered if the guy was dumb. Did he actually expect him, Sasuke Uchia, to spend the money he earned from robbing others or heaven forbid actually use his own money.

"I have better idea" Sasuke actually grinned. Maliciously that is.

**AN:** Again sorry for the late update and **THANK U ALL **for reviewing me. Next chap. jail ends and ...find out. Hope u enjoyed. **Review? **


	7. Chapter 7

**AN: **I was sort of disappointed I didn't get that many reviews for my new story _Our almost undiscovered secret._** T.T .** Anyways hope you enjoy and **REVIEW?** Thxs to everyone who reviewed the last chap.

**XO XO X O XO XO XO XO XO XO XO XO XO XO XO**

"You know this isn't right. You guys can't possibly have all that against a little girl." Sakura muttered. The cops had accused of her of things like destroying property, attempted murder, punching an officer, breaking another's nose, disruption of peace,etc etc.. Sakura cringed and thought of all the hard years in jail she would have to do. No way was she going to accept it, she would just break out.

"Er, since you're a juvenile we won't hold it all against you, just some like murder" the cop scratched his head.

"ATTEMPTED" she corrected. "Besides I demand to be let go of now." When the cops shook their heads Sakura frowned and remembered her money. Ah yes, bribing should do it.

"Hey, look what I got." She waved the money around. The guys just looked on blankly.

"Sorry we don't take cash bribes. If you had ice-cream or cucumbers we would." Sakura's eyes twitched. Who the hell took cucumbers as bribes? As if reading her mind an officer replied.

"Cucumbers are cool so eating them would make us cool." the cop sounded very pleased with this and gave a thumbs up sign.

Sakura ignored him placing the money on a table and went to pick up the telephone.

"Don't stop me because I know I'm allowed to call my lawyer." She choose not to listen to the 5 min. warning.

IN THE MEAN TIME W/ SASUKE + KAKASHI:

Sasuke took out a bright polka- dotted t-shirt and raised an eyebrow at Kakashi, who just shrugged. Was it his fault Anko didn't have a fashion sense? Sasuke threw the thing up in the air and burned it with tiny fire balls. He was working on another one when Kakashi went to answer the ringing telephone.

"Hello, this the very hottie hot hot Kakashi speaking." Sasuke rolled his eyes at this, picking up a duck pictured pant.

"PAPA DARLING!" Kakashi winced and held the phone away from his ringing ear.

"Yes, Sakura?" he sighed, then. "Wait, where the hell are you!?"

"AH see see, papa darling you do care about me and you didn't deny being my papa." she squealed. "My papa loves me" she was saying to someone in the background.

"Oi, that's not the case, Sakura. I see no point..." Kakashi sighed trailing off since Sakura wasn't even listening. Sasuke finally left the clothes and plucked the phone from the depressed sensei.

"Listen to me Sakura." Sasuke was all business like, not that he ever wasn't. "Stop squealing and tell me where you are."

"SASU-KUN. I'm so happy to hear from you!"

" Dammit stop saying unnecessary thing and tell us where you are." Sasuke growled flatly, if that's possible. Kakashi bristled with anger. How dare that emo brute talk to his darling daughter that way? He glared at Sasuke and loomed over him. Sasuke turned and gave him the flat look again.

"So their saying they wanna take my picture and their torture Naruto. I can hear him screaming and ..."Sasuke stopped paying attention to her ramblings.

"Where are you?" He asked again when he heard some one say time's up.

"What do you mean time's up!? I haven't finished. Oh you want to fight now ,huh?" Sasuke stared as he heard shouts and things breaking. Then " Oh by the way,we're in jail." The line went dead after that.

"I'm not surprised she ended up there. It was a matter of time." Sasuke said then walked out the door, Kakashi demanding to know where they were headed.

WITH SAKURA:

"Take that and that and that and-" She was breathing hard, her fists crushing a huge officer. Not that it mattered to her.

"Now you have murdering four officers, injuring others, destruction of..."

"SHUT UP." Sakura muttered. "It was attem- actually they were all injured." Sakura looked guilty at the place then whispered her apologies.

"Not to worry we'll have decorators re-do everything with your money." At once people streamed in and everything was squeaky clean with the injured officers being carried away. Sakura blinked and stood back as all the action buzzed by her.

"Now since that's over with let's get back to the picture. BUT, first..." the officers all got on their knee's and cried, holding on to her delicate hands.

"We're sorry, so very sorry since this may ruin your life but hey look at the bright side people will know you...as a 4 year old murderer." Sakura climbed on to the table to get away from the stream that was produced. The main water source being tears.

"NOW!!" They all gathered around her. Sakura stared in mute horror, she didn't have strength left after beating up the others just awhile ago after all she didn't have her older body's stamina.

"WAHHH" Sakura's eyes widened and her adorable baby little face scrunched up. Big fat tears poured down her chubby cheeks and the officers cried with her as well.

"We're deeply, truly sorry but we must do this." Sakura didn't hear and cried louder. That won't last much longer since her anger's brewing right underneath the surface.

"We're sorry but say cheese for your mugshot."

Sakura lunged for the nearest one.

FLASH.

She had her hands fisted and aimed at someone.

SNAP. Another picture.

She was lifting a chair to break someone's back.

Snap. Snap. This continued with Sakura in crying, punching, shouting, confused poses, choking officers. She was so worked up she didn't even know they were taking her pictures already.

WITH THE TRAUAMATIZED NARUTO.

His hands were working fast but he couldn't get the bonds loosened.

"I love you." the television glowed brightly in the dimmed room.

"NOOO you don't." he shouted back.

"YOU love me."

"Good god, I HATE you. SHADUP SHADUP you fat, purple, ugly, fake Dino." Isn't it sad, he was yelling at something that couldn't respond nor hear him? Or could it...

"No you don't." Barney laughed and stared at Naruto...or at the camera where filming crew were filming but Naruto swore Barney said his name. The agony continued as Barney sang some horrible songs with a cracked voice. God, they had the stupidest plots ever.

"Hey there, Barney. Isn't a beautiful day in the neighborhood, a beautiful day in the neighborhood, would you be--"

"Well of course it's a beautiful day in the neighborhood when the Tubbies drop by and of course Naruto." Barney grinned twirling and swirling some magic dust.

Naruto's eyes widened. Tubbies? Who were the-- He should've known. Naruto screamed louder when the Teletubbies entered.

"WinkWink"

"Tipsy"

"La---what's the rest?"

"Pooh, that's Winnie the---oh wait I'm Poe...Edgar Ellen Poe, that is..."

"What the hell?" Naruto stared at the Teletubbies, whom he hated since...forever. They had almost killed t.v. for him. Every single time, he shuddered with distaste. But what was wrong with this picture? Can anyone guess?

"Well, it is a beautiful day but a nice day to get drunk, isn't it?" Mr. Rogers grabbed the packs of liquor from Poe (?) and drank.

"Wait for me!" Barney arrived and in the process sat on Lala's ball. Lala pissed off, took Poe's scooter and tried to bash Barney's head with it.

Naruto just stared and stared until he heard Sakura's scream. He quickly got to work and tired to untie himself. Naruto ignored his bleeding wrists, not caring so long as he could get to Sakura.

NARUTO  V . V (X . X ) NARUTO

" Sakura- Chan!!" Naruto ran over and saw her screaming at some officers trying to get a camera back. Looking at her Naruto could see she wasn't doing any better than him, physical wise. Sakura looked drained, her button face all tired looking. Naruto couldn't bear to look at such a cute and young face look like that.

"You bastards, what did you do to Sakura-chan?" Naruto punched the closest one next to him. The guy groaned and clutched his aching stomach, bending over coughing blood. The officers stared in bewilderment. What was up with kids these days? All at once, they with drew to a corner. Naruto grinned and went to Sakura, who frowned over his bleeding hands. As she ripped some cloth from her pants and bandaged it around his arm, both kids failed to see a shadow behind them.

"I love you, you love-"

"OmG it's Barney" Naruto started hyperventilating and hid behind Sakura. What if he sat on Naruto? Barney paused to take a drag from his cigarette and blew the smoke into the air.

"I didn't know Barney smoked" Sakura and Naruto stared, while someone sneaked up behind them.

Y ?????????? Y???????????Y??????????? P ????????

"Ah, damn" Kakashi muttered when he saw where they were. "I'm the father of a criminal". Sasuke just paused in midst of walking and stared hard at him. Kakashi acted as if Sasuke didn't exist.

" Let's see you have my students" Kakashi emphasized students to show the emo he wasn't crazy about being a papa .

"You mean those freak kids with the strength and other techniques little kids shouldn't know about."

"I taught them myself" Kakashi puffed in pride and he had to agree on the freak part. Naruto was a freak most of the time.

"Really, why don't you tell me." the officer nodded as Kakashi started on his life story. In the mean time Sasuke had acquired the keys.

"Kakashi" Sasuke tossed the keys to him and nodded towards the hall that most likely led to the cells.

"Now see here, you can't just barge in and take out criminals" the guy pounded his fists on the desk.

"Really? What criminals?" Sasuke yawned. What was taking the pervert so long?

"Those little kids. You have to pay the bail money then they need to appear in court."

"On what charges?" Sasuke leaned on the wall and stared. The guy took out a sheet of paper. Sasuke raised an eyebrow as if to say that was it? The guy shook his head then let the paper roll onto the floor.

How in world had she made all that charges against her? Sasuke groaned inwardly.

"It doesn't matter. She's 4 so all of that won't count." the cold voice dripped over the officer, who in return could only blink.

"You'll need to pay"

**With Kakashi:**

"Naruto. Sakura" he called out and then groaned where the two were huddled in a corner, hugging tightly. Hmm, what do you know, some ammunition to attack Sasuke with. He grinned and picked up the kids, tucking them under his arms.

Wonder what the officer torture them with. Maybe he could try it.

U.U U.U T.T

WHILE KAKASHI WAS GONE LOOKING FOR THE MIDGET CRIMINALS:

" Let them go" Sasuke stated flatly.

"We can if you give the required amount of money for their bail" the cop explained for the tenth time. Sasuke again ignored it. Oh how he wanted his powers from his normal self.

"No"

"Then they can't go" Sasuke stared and wondered if the guy was dumb. Did he actually expect him, THE Sasuke Uchiha to spend the money he earned from so cleverly robbing others or heaven forbid actually use his own money? Why would he do that when he could do it another way without spending a cent?

"I have better idea" Sasuke actually grinned. Maliciously that is.

"Really what's that?" The officer asked dryly. Sasuke looked at him and then all hell broke loose as things went up in flames, people being hurled around and even more dangerous criminals escaping.

"Whoa, what happened here?" Kakashi dropped the small kids with a thump.

"How, How am I going to deal with this?! There's dangerous criminals loose now because of you! They were supposed to be transported to the main jails today." the head officer raged running around in circles.

"Guess that's your problem now" Sasuke calmly stated then went to poke his girlfriend on her still-big-for-4 yr old- forehead. It wasn't actually a warm _I missed you_ but that was as close as it would ever get for him.

"Wake up" he poked her again and kicked the dobe in the face.

**OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO**

"Papa darling, we're going shopping again" Sakura tsked at the horrible clothes. No way in hell was she going to dress in those clothes.

"It's not my fault. Anko sucks with clothes" Kakashi denied hotly. Sakura twitched. Someone was making her papa darling look bad and Sakura wasn't going to stand for that. She silently put Anko on her hit list.

"We're not wearing them either" Sasuke had some sunglasses on, claiming the freaky shirts were blinding him with their bright colors.

"You'll have to wear them tomorrow at least, since you can't wear today's. Those clothes are dirty, plus I don't have anything else." Kakashi laughed with glee.

"Shut Up" Naruto shouted, tearing up a Barney shirt. He swore it was calling his name.

"Fine." Kakashi finally relented. "But you two aren't going with us. You're going to be with babysitters."

Sasuke and Naruto protested claiming they were too old for babysitters. Kakashi in the mean time was wondering who would babysit those devils. He groaned with frustration. He hated his life.

O OO O O

**NOTE: sorry, sorry but I realized cousin deleted my story OUR ALMOST UNDISCOVERED SECRET so it's not there. If people want to read it tell me, so I'll re-post it. SORRY. **

_**OOOOOOOOO**_

PREVIEW:

"But I feel so bad doing that." Naruto pouted. He didn't want the nice lady to worry about them.

"I don't care dobe. I'm getting my revenge" Sasuke ran through the bushes.

"Then why are we going to your house?"

"Because I'm not going to be caught wearing this stupid shirt." gesturing toward the blue shirt with rainbows all over and frogs jumping over the rainbow. Naruto burst out laughing ...again. Who wouldn't?

AND:

"You look very familiar" the bushy browed twins looked down at Naruto and Sasuke.

"Those are some of the most youthlyest clothes we've ever seen. Where did you buy them?

" Are you stupid? Who would willingly buy crap like this?" Naruto shouted in bewilderment.

"We'll trade spandex for those" Lee brought out green spandex and the boys shuddered.

"LEE. GAI!! How many times do I have to tell you stop spreading Spandex Fashion around?" Tenten's voice was heard.

"Hn"

Ah, shit. Sasuke groaned. No way was he going to live through this. Hyugguya (sp?) would thrive on this piece of news...

AND:

"Are you sure?" Naruto asked, frowning

"Yea. It'll take most of my charka with this body so I won't be able to use some until about 4 days later."

"But it's worth it, isn't it?" Naruto gave a foxy grin.

"Hn" a small grin appeared.

oooooooooooo

AN: Hope you enjoyed. REVIEW? Thnx. AGAIN SOORRY. I updated more than a month later...I think. Review?? Thnx. AppleBloss


	8. Chapter 8

AN:Extremely sorry for not updating sooner but I'm very busy. I don't even get proper sleep anymore. T.T. Hope you guys like it and review? Gratci.



"Get over it Sasuke-kun" Sakura said in exasperation. All the angsting emo clouds were covering her and everything else in sight. It was very hard to navigate in such a way.

"No" Sakura sighed once again at the usual words. At least it was an improvement from Hn.

"But Sasuke-kun it's just a shirt, it won't matter." Sakura regretted the words at his mega watt glare. No need for him to be normal sized for it to work. The glare could do its work at any size or age.

"Um, it's the inside that counts and maybe people won't recognize you?" Sakura tried to make him feel better since he wouldn't want any physical contact right about now, not that he ever did. Sigh. And that was the down side of dating an emo, I-going-to-kill-my-brother, tomato loving avenger. "Plus it's not like you're the only one who's wearing crappy clothes." Sakura pointed at Naruto's and her own shirt.

"A Sakura mine is the crappiest and I can thank you for that." Sasuke muttered in a dangerous tone while Kakashi stopped to laugh again. The smart sensei had even brought a camera and was currently flashing away. Kakashi was cackling and claiming he was such an evil mastermind and would make millions selling this or better yet blackmail. Take that you stupid emo bastard that was making his darling daughter wobble her cute little mouth, trying not to cry.

Once Sasuke glanced at Sakura's face he regretted it. Sort of, anyways. If Sakura was her elder self, she would've act on her ninja instincts and hidden the urge to cry. But as time was passing they all seemed to be forgetting that and giving in the urge to be childish and express feelings. That's why Sasuke took a step forward and patted her awkwardly on the head. Not really affectionate, is it? But Sakura didn't care and squealed with delight as she hurled her tiny self in her equally tiny boyfriend's arms.

Kakashi was sobbing loudly as he snapped away. He couldn't wait to show these to his grandchildren. It was so cute, beautiful, magnificent of the two hugg---Wait just a fuc----fluffy marshmallow fruitcake minute, no way was the bastard getting that close to his precious daughter. There will be NO grandchildren, he tells you. NONE!

Kakashi glared and the next thing you know Sasuke was hurled into some random bush with blueberries….?

"What the hell was that, you pervert?!" Sasuke exploded and went to attack Kakashi, who just held him in the air. Sasuke was too furious to notice and kept peddling his little legs forward.

"Someone was walking by; they could've seen you in that horrible shirt. I was just saving your reputation." Kakashi said innocently, except his grin stated otherwise.

Sakura sighed deeply; at the rate they were going the stores would be closed. At least Naruto was behaving and Sakura went to thank him for that, except…

"Papa darling, where's Naruto?"

**XO XO XO XOXO XO XOXO **

With our well behaved Naruto:

Naruto was waving hi and good mornings to everyone walking through the busy streets and they in return were waving back, claiming what a nice boy he was. Naruto beamed as a gleaming white carriage stopped in front of him and a red carpet tumbling down. Next some ramen footpads came and opened the carriage door for him.

"Welcome oh great ramen eater. Eat us, the best ramen out there".

Now your probably saying this is can't even happen. But that's because this is all a dream. You were looking at his head, his inner conscious, his mind---

"Ramen, more ramen, please." Naruto was mumbling, drool dripping onto the ground. "Ramen. Oh, dear ramen you taste so good!"

Hinta Hyuuga was sitting at the ramen stand, where she knew a ramen hungry Naruto would come sooner than later. Now some might call that stalking but for Hinata it was a tad different. For you see, the ultra, mega, shy girl had screwed up her courage to finally tell Naruto the truth.

Hinata jumped when she heard his voice and squeaked loudly. Okay, she wasn't expecting him to come but not this soon! She wasn't ready, she---Hinata took a deep breath then went around to the seat she heard his voice coming from. Funny how she didn't see his shinny, blond, head though.

"Ramen." Hinta glanced down and jerked back in surprise, for she saw a little boy that looked like Naruto. No, it couldn't be…could it? Hinata walked slowly and gently shook the child awake and cringed when she saw how alike they looked.

"Um..I..uh…"She stuttered and didn't know what to say. But the child did.

"You wanna buy me some ramen, right?! That's great, now I want..." Naruto rambled on and on happily while she thought about how they even had the same apatite.

"I..um..w-whhat's yyyour nname?" Hinata cringed not wanting to really know. Who would if they were in her position?

"I'm Naru—Hey what about my ramen, lady?" Naruto was distracted as he saw someone order ramen, who mind you had come after him. That could've been his ramen!

Hinata in the mean time was feeling seriously wobbly. Her greatest fear had occurred. Naruto had someone and now they had a child together!

"OMG, the ramen is good." Naruto had beat the guy over the head and stolen his ramen. Wasn't he just an angel? "See lady now I wa---hey are you ok?" Naruto leaped down and went to poke the lady, who wasn't moving and if he heard right, she wasn't breathing that well.

"KAKASHI, some lady just dropped dead on me." He shouted, loudly.



"There you go, there's Naruto" Kakashi yawned and wondered what sane person could even stay alive around Naruto. The person made a good choice dying, rather than staying with one of the devil's advocate. Forget that, they _were_ the devils and sometimes he had trouble figuring out which one of them was the head devil. _Sigh._

"She's not dead, Naruto." Sakura sweat dropped. She should've known it would be like this with Hinata. Sasuke however, wasn't as understanding as much as being irritated. He went next to the girl and kicked her roundly on the face. When everyone protested, he just shrugged and did it again until she awoke.

"Uhh, I-I--." Hinata stumbled and her eyes widened in horror when she saw the mini glaring Sasuke and the equally small Sakura.

"Sasssuke a-a-nd Sakura have kids?" she squeaked. How would this be possible since Sakura had never shown but then she had been going out with Sasuke? But then….her head spun and –

"Don't even think about it" Kakashi's eyes crinkled as he held the girl's head. Hinata was after all, still lying on the sidewalk. "I need you to do me a favor" then as an after thought added. "But don't expect me doing a favor in return."



"So, I, um—ho-ow old a—ree you?"

"4" Sasuke clipped out. Hinata nodded her head and the uncomfortable silence ensued.

"Those a-rr-e nic—c-e sh-hir-ts" she said in a quiet voice. Ticked off, Sasuke beckoned the girl to kneel to his height. When she did he grabbed her by her shirt and uttered in a dangerous tone.

"Don't kid with me. This shirt is so crappy even the dobe can tell. Don't TALK ABOUT THIS SHIRT AGAIN." The words were said carefully. "If you do, you dead, understand?"

"Don't listen to the teme, lady" Naruto smiled at the shivering girl, who was double thinking her decision of watching them, but looking at the smiling blond she shook her head at those thoughts.



"Hurry up, dobe" Sasuke muttered at the reluctant Naruto, who shot him an '_are you sure' _look. Sasuke in return growled. When the unsuspecting Hinata came around the benches with their ice-cream, she never saw it coming. "It" was this:

"HINATACHAN!" With that Naruto launched himself on her and hugged the girl into fainting.

"Is she dead, yet?" Sasuke crossed his arms, waiting impatiently. This was precious time, you know.

"Nah, she's hanging in there. Barely though." Sasuke was not happy to hear this so he went and came back with a big log.

"TEME, what're you doing?!" Naruto was outraged, as if Sasuke cared. Nope, he only cared for revenge. Where have we heard this before? Sasuke lifted the log over his head and banged it on Hinata's head, once then twice, this time making sure she was out of it.

"Let's go already" With that they headed out.

**WITH SAKURA/KAKASHI:**

"Oh, we'll need these and these…"Sakura grabbed another little shirt, dropping it on top of an enormous pile. Kakashi, in the mean time was bored to tears and could hardly stay awake. Finally he heard the magic words. Almost, anyway.

"Let's go, Papa. Then we'll shop for you three." Kakashi groaned loudly then placed Sakura's clothes on cash register.

"WHAAATT?! Are you trying to rob me?!" Kakashi screamed at the price.

**WITH SASUKE + NARUTO:**

"I'm guessing you have an evil, brilliant plan?" Sasuke and Naruto were currently running through bushes. They would've preferred trees but you know, short legs and all that. Sasuke grunted.

"But I feel so bad doing that." Naruto pouted. He didn't want the nice lady to worry about them.

"I don't care dobe. I'm getting my revenge" Sasuke ran through the bushes.

"Then why are we going to your house?"

"Because I'm not going to be caught wearing this stupid shirt." gesturing toward the blue shirt with rainbows all over and frogs jumping over the rainbow. In thought bubble it showed the frogs were happy and they loved the sun. Sasuke disagreed and if he ever saw a frog again he would slowly rip it pieces. He would do it very, painfully, and slowly for ever loving the dumb sun. Who loved the damn sun, anyways?

Naruto burst out laughing ...again. Who wouldn't?

"Say something and you'll die."

"Make me teme" Sasuke growled at Naruto and launched at the laughing boy. They were on the ground rolling around and soon out in the open street.

"Well Lee, isn't this just a youthly vision? Two friends enjoying their youthful life and the nature of their wonderfully youthful friendship." Naruto and Sasuke froze and cringed at the voice of Matio Gai. Of all the rotten luck! Sasuke brought out the sunglasses out when Gai gave his blinding smile. Too much happiness and brightness so early was definitely not good for him.

"Yes Gai-sensei, so beautiful." Lee and Gai held on to each other as they cried. Oh, how quickly youth was spreading!

"You look very familiar." the bushy browed twins looked down at Naruto and Sasuke.

"Those are some of the youthliest clothes we've ever seen. Where did you buy them?

"Are you stupid? Who would willingly buy crap like this?" Naruto shouted in bewilderment.

"We'll trade spandex for those" Lee brought out green spandex and the boys shuddered.

"LEE. GAI!! How many times do I have to tell you stop spreading Spandex Fashion around?" Tenten's voice was heard. "You'll destroy man-kind and all my sanity"

"Hn" Ah, shit. Sasuke groaned. No way was he going to live through this. Hyuuguya (sp?) would thrive on this piece of news...

"Why Tenten how can you say something like this? Spandex is the reason for life. To think I raised you so. How did you turn out like this?!" Gai knelt and wept. His eyes grew wide and a river fell. Naruto went under him and cleaned some dirt from his hands.

"You two look familiar." Neji looked at the two boys, his pale eyes taking in every detail.

"That's because we're N-" Sasuke clamped Naruto's mouth shut. No way was he going to let Hyuuga(sp?) know he had let the Hokage turn him into a child because he was busy listening to his girlfriend about not hurting her sensei. Do you know how weak and pathetic that sounds?"

"It's none of your business who we are." Sasuke sneered and dragged the dobe away.

"WAIT! You didn't tell us your answer." Lee shouted.

"Give me those Lee." Tenten dragged the huge bags filled with Spandex away from her friend and stabbed the as many spandex clothes as she could, ripping them to pieces. Neji in the mean time puffed with pride. Now you can see why he loved his girlfriend so much. And to prove it he went and patted her head.

WITH KAKASHI:

Sure they would call him a bad father but he didn't really care what people said. Besides he really wasn't a real dad so it was okay for him to let a four year old shop for three guys in a big mall with his credit card. Besides he didn't want to know the price since he didn't want another heart attack. To think some clothes cost that much. It was robbery!

So now here he was relaxing and enjoying his lovely new book. Okay it wasn't so new anymore since he already read the ones he bought when Anko declared him her date. Was the woman crazy?! Well okay she was but why him?? Why not Gai? He had enough on his plate and he didn't want to go out with a psycho. He had enough of that going on his life.

"Kaka..shi? Is that you?" a sweet voice whispered out to him, an old familiar voice he hadn't heard in a long time and knew he wouldn't hear ever again. His head jerked up and eyes widened, his throat clogging up. "Is that really you Kakashi?

END:

PREVIEW

"I told you we don't a babysitter." Sasuke growled. What was he a child?

"Yes you are." Kakashi smirked. How he loved tourting the emo bastard. "Besides I'm the oldest so my word is law."

"Papa darling I don't mind." Sakura grinned. Of course she wouldn't since she ahd planned out the entire evening. And it included a lot of fun.

"But why does it have to be him?" Sasuke groaned inwardly but his voice came out cold.

"Why not him, Sasu? I think he's very handsome and he's going to be my prince." Sakura added some flowers in her white castle drawing.

This time there was no mistaking the growl that came from Sasuke.

AND:

"PAPA!!!" Sakura screamed. The monster was here and going to get her.

Sasuke walked slowly towards his screaming girlfriend with his trusty shovel dragging behind him.

AND:

Anko twitched in anger. How dare Kakashi do this! The bastard was so going to pay. PAY!! She laughed like maniac and went to work on a plan…right after going to the pet store.

AN: Again sorry for the lateness. But as I said_ very_ busy. Wish I wasn't though. Anyways I'll keep it short…so **review**? Thnxs. AppleBloss. .


	9. Chapter 9

AN: I did have this written before but it was deleted

AN: I've been gone from ff and the Naruto world for a while since I've discovered the awesome world of j-dramas. But I've return now for…who knows? P Enjoy and Review?

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"Yeah it's me Sasuke like you don't know." Kakashi sweat dropped. He wasn't stupid as the Uchia probably thought he was. As a matter of fact he was one of the greatest nin out there, thank you very much.

"Who?" the lady in front of him pursed her lips in confusion. Kakashi pointed his finger and laughed his eyes never leaving his book.

"I always knew you were a girl Sasuke or better yet Sasukina." He cracked up; people stopped and watched the crazy man. "Hell you really do fit the part. But don't think I'll be fooled by your stupid jutsu because it's a known fact that you'll want revenge over me having proof your gay."

"Kakashi, who is Sasuke? Can't you remember me? I'm your teammate, Rin." The woman pleaded, her eyes filling up with emotion. After all these years she had finally found her friend and now he wouldn't even acknowledge her. The woman moved her hand to touch Kakashi and the next thing that she knew she was flung way half way across the store.

"Mess with me, but never bring up my _dead_ teammates if you have a revenge plan." Kakashi fumed his breaths coming in gasps. "Rin's dead and she'll _stay_ dead. Understand?"

"BUT SHE NEVER DIED STUPID! BECAUSE I'M HERE!" the lady yelled back. Kakashi stared back and just snorted his face buried in the book and walking away. What an odd set of events.

(YES I KNOW WHAT UR ALL THINKING. Rin is dead but let's say she never did for the sake of my story. I don't like having oc's in stories so I thought hey, why not just resurrect the dead a little. Besides Anko needs some competition, don't you think? )

**WITH SASUKE AND NARUTO:**

"Teme I think we're too late. Besides don't you think it's a bit lame?" Naruto asked as Sasuke dragged behind a huge rolling bucket filled with balloons. What was in these balloons? Well….

"No, it's not dobe. Your idea sucks even more. Why would I transform into a girl and have him take me out to the ramen shop and eat all the ramen I want? I'm not gay." Naruto developed a chronic coughing fit when he heard this. Sasuke's eye brow ticked with annoyance.

"Don't make me hit you with one of these compost balloons." He warned. Che he was loosing his touch, normally he would've just thrown it at the dobe. Besides his plan was much more elaborate and would've made an evil genius proud. He was going to walk up to that bastard sensei of his and throw the smelly compost balloons on his face. That'll make him take off running down some rotten alley way where some nasty dogs would attack him. Said dogs would rip off his mask; Sasuke would take mask-less Kakashi's picture and post all over Konaha. From there the women would see the freaky, ugly, old man that he was and beat him up. Wasn't he just plain brilliant?

"Woahhhh…" Naruto gaped as he saw a women fly across and break some walls. What was going on?

"I AM RIN, stupid. I can prove it." The woman grabbed Kakashi by the scruff of his neck and whispered. The white haired ninja widened his eyes and laughed. The woman nodded and smiled….then went flying again.

"Do you really expect me to believe that?" Kakashi stared at the woman who looked madder by the minute. "I'm not going to kill you for this Uchiha because I don't want my darling daughter to be hurt but you will pay." He snared and walked away.

"Hey hey Sasuke. Why's Kakashi calling that woman Sasuke when your right here?" Naruto looked at the woman that charged at Kakashi and bashed him on the head. Sasuke bashed Naruto on the head and picked up one of the balloons. Damn the woman was hitting his target! This was his revenge and she was spoiling it! Sasuke growled and threw five balloons at the woman who turned towards him.

"Don't kill my target, stupid." The woman gaped at the boy then looked at the two boys. Kakashi had son that didn't respect him?

"Sasuke?" Kakashi looked at the midget and groaned when he was bombarded with disgusting balloons.

"OH GOD, MY EYES! You bastard, that's got to be the smelliest and ugliest stuff I've ever seen. Kakashi swiped the gooey and chunky bits from his mask. Sasuke took out a camera and cackled. The time had arrived.

The masked nin gave a high pitched scream when he noticed some of the filth had fallen on his precious book.

"NOOOOOOO my love." He sobbed and wiped it off. "The world's ending!" The dirt had smudged the letters and the page was covered in a muddy brown color. Quickly Kakashi tired to grab a cloth but couldn't find any. His hand went to his mask and ripped it off.

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! NOOOOO" Sasuke Uchiha lost it then.

**WITH SAKURA:**

Her tiny body wobbled with the weight of shopping bags. She had maxed out her darling papa's card but at least now they had _very_ nice clothes. Sakura walked aimlessly through the huge store since she couldn't see anything over the mountain of bags.

"Oomph" The tiny girl tried to gather her wits as she tumbled to the ground.

"Let me help you with that my youthful flower." Sakura froze as the monster from before appeared so close to her face.

"Well what do you say?!" The monster gave a huge pining smile.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHH! Papa help! I'm being kidnapped!" The monster shook its head and tried to calm her down. The furry browed green monster made some faces that thought was funny but to the girl, hideous. The next thing she knew it was one the floor in a huge lump.

"You ok?" The gruff voice came from behind her and Sakura gasped in surprise.

"A prince?" she whispered looking at his luxurious long hair and the white aura around him. His pale whites stared back, unblinking.

"Ah." Neji twitched slightly. He didn't really want to start a conversation but he would…shocking isn't it? Why? That's because Lee had once again challenged him that they must help that in need and see who gets the most people to give out compliments. The entire thing was a stupid idea and he was only doing it to humor Ten-Ten who thought he wasn't charming enough. He bristled at that. Damn woman he'd show her, making him do things out of his calm nature.

"Why are you shopping all by yourself?"

"Papa gave me his credit card and …now I'm lost." The girl's lips wobbled and water formed around her green iris. Ah damn!

"Fine. I'll help you look." Neji reluctantly held the hand the tiny girl stuck out. Ha this will show Ten-Ten what a charmer he was.

"Since your helping me can we go into that shop? They have some pretty dresses…"

Neji groaned in horror.

**With Sasuke and the rest:**

An amused Kakashi held a fuming Sasuke as he ran…yet got nowhere.

"I'll get you." Sasuke whispered dangerously. "Watch your back, baka sensei."

"Papa darling let Sasuke down." A calm looking Sakura turned from waving bye to her prince.

"Sakura…take that off." Sasuke pointed at her pale pink and white dress.

"TEME! Don't even think of defiling Sakura- chan in front of us!" A scandalized Naruto ran towards Sasuke.

"Children these days sure move fast." Kakashi giggled flipping a page and taking the mountains of shopping bags.

"Get your mind out of the gutter, dobe. It was blinding me with its brightness." Sasuke pushed Naruto off of him. In return he got compost balloon in his face.

"Naruto." An angry Sakura bonked him on the head and walked over to a dirty faced Sasuke.

"What the--?" Sasuke sputtered when Sakura cleaned off the dirt from his face.

"Ha, Sasuke's being babied. BAAAAAAAABYYYYYYYY." Kakashi bent next to Sasuke and took out a bib. "You'll need this too."

Rin stayed on the side, her eyes following all the actions but one thing swirled all around her head. Kakashi had a daughter!

"Who are you and can you get me some ramen?" Naruto poked Rin.

"I'm Rin, Kakashi's ex-teammate from long ago." Rin waited for Kakashi to deny it.

"Yea there _was_ a Rin who _died._" Kakashi glared at her and walked away leaving her to sputter.

**NIGHT TIME:**

"Why are you here?" Kakashi looked at the woman next to him. "This is my house, go to your own."

"Not until she leaves." Anko growled pointing at Rin's back. "Besides how do you know she's not an enemy?"

Kakashi smiled mysteriously. "She remembered a very special secret." Anko curious pestered him until Sasuke threw the t.v. at her.

"BRAT! What do you think your doing?" Anko breathed fire, glaring closely at Sasuke.

"Hn." Sasuke stared blankly at her. "trying to get an unwanted noisy hag out."

"My new plasma t.v. " Kakashi wept hugging his Icha Icha Paradise special edition.

**Morning: **

Kakashi was currently walking down the sidewalk asking random people if they could baby sit a retard, an emo bastard, and a half angel/ half devil daughter that was his. Rin had volunteered to stay with them but Kakashi would have none of it. They were going to go see the Hokage to confirm everything. Whatever Hokage said he would believe after all the Hokage was the Hokage for a reason. Kakashi groaned. Damn it , how had everything become so complicated?!

"Yosh, my youthful rival I've been looking everywhere for you!" Kakashi groaned and kicked Gai in the face. He was about to poof away when he came up with a brilliant idea.

**WITH SASUKE, SAKURA, NARUTO:**

"Naruto, stop climbing up the closet selves." Sakura muttered, too tired to do anything. She had to force Naruto to wear the black t-shirt with a white peace sign on it. He had asserted that he would never betray the color orange and he was not emo like the teme. Sasuke had been pleased with the color choice and gladly taken it. How well his girlfriend knew him…not that he was glad or anything but still he had poked her on the forehead. When Naruto had protested about the colors Sasuke grabbed an orange marker and colored the white into orange. Naruto then climbed up to the closet self on protest against Sasuke who was bored and stabbing a picture of the Hokage.

"Sasuke- kun, stop that." Sakura took the picture of the blond woman away and then went to shout at Naruto when she suddenly froze.

"Naruto." She spoke softly and pointed behind him. "He-e's there!"

Naruto turned his head extremely slowly and froze a look of horror on his face.

"AHHHHHHHHHH!!"

Sasuke ran towards the two screaming idiots and was unprepared for the launch.

"SASUKE-KUN!!" Sakura and Naruto screeched jumping into his arms. Sasuke stared at where they pointed and his eyes twitched.

What the fuck?! Sasuke Uchiha was not amused.

END

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Preview:

"You are so beautiful. The most wonderful looking girl I've ever seen." Naruto smiled hugely. "I love you and your hair. It's so soft."

The "lady" in question growled and went to punch the brat out. Naruto was completely unaware and still ranting

"I want to be just like you. Will you show me how to have such glorious long hair." He turned just in time to avoid the punch not because he saw it coming but because he had stars in his eyes and he was in his own dream land.

**AND:**

Sasuke patted the ground and laughed evilly. He then patted his shovel, which was the love of his emo life. Do you know how many people he could kill, maim, and injure?! Sasuke looked at the red ribbon poking up from the pile of dirt and went to cover it. He didn't need any evidence showing.

"Sasuke-kun did you see Sasuke?" Sakura walked up to him, her hands filled with flowers. "We were going to have tea." Sakura glanced at him and her expression changed. "What did you kill now?"

Sasuke ignored the last comment. "I'm right here Sakura and why the hell would I want to have tea with you?" He then went back to patting the dirt and smiling with glee.

Sakura sighed with exasperation. Why did he have to be emo? "Not you Sasuke, the bear you got me. _That_ Sasuke-kun."

Sasuke froze, the shovel lifted in the air. He stepped over a piece of red ribbon. "Hn".

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AN: Extremely sorry for not updating soon but hope you enjoyed. Review? I'll try to update more frequently and maybe I'll start a new story. Should I? Anyway review? Thanks. ) AppleBloss.


	10. Chapter 10

**AN:** Thanks to the people who reviewed me and I'm sorry for the wait (the very long wait). Enjoy and review?

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Chapter 10:

"Get off of me! You're both heavy and dobe, stop tugging on my hair." Sasuke growled and threw Naruto back in the closet. He tried to shake off his clinging girlfriend, who only buried her face deeper into his shoulder. It was an "awwww" moment for everyone but the boy who should have acted like the gallant hero. Those moments were actually moments of horror for Sasuke because there was no way he was going to admit he was enjoying himself.

"He's back for us." Sakura whimpered softly. Sasuke glanced at his girlfriend's buried head and frowned. Who was back for her? There was no way he was letting anyone have what was rightfully his. HIS.

"He's back for us Sakura-chan!" Naruto shouted running out of the closet Sasuke had shoved him back into.

"Dobe…what's that stuck on your shirt?" Naruto stopped in the midst of his shouting and froze. His hands slowly went to the back of his shirt and connected with something small and furry.

"Sakura-chan," he whimpered softly, tears forming around his eyes.

"Don't move, Naruto." Sakura's hand went around his hand and together they counted to "three" and pulled the thing away from Naruto's shirt.

"Well, hello kids."

"AHHHHHHH!"

All Sasuke did was raise his eyebrow to indicate the wtf moment.

**WITH KAKASHI:**

"Hmm…yes…so I see," Tsunade nodded her head every so often while Rin related her story of how she had NOT died.

Kakashi, who had been leaning on the wall reading his book, straightened. "So, you're saying you had everyone think you were dead when in reality you had amnesia because you fell down the steps when you went swimming?" He pointed his finger at her. "What kind of lame excuse is that?!"

"What?! I never said that and that doesn't even make any sense!" the lady fumed. Did Kakashi loose some brain cells or what? Rin shook her head. This was definitely not the old Kakashi, who had been emo and serious. The man in front of her was hardly ever serious and a horrible father. Maybe, hopefully…this was not the real Kakashi.

"I am," he smiled at her as if he knew what she was thinking. "How else would I know you have the most horrible sense of interior decorating… not to mention night gowns?"

"Whoa, this is interesting," the Hokage nodded as she drank more sake.

"Oh, indeed. I had to take care of her when she had the chicken pox because I was the only one in our team who already had it," Kakashi smiled broadly as he turned to the next page in his book. "Imagine my surprise when I found her wearing p. j.'s with foots. It had rainbows and a princess lying underneath it. What kind of ninja wears crap like that?!"

Both Kakashi and Tsunade doubled over laughing. The sake poured out of Tsunade's nose and mouth and straight on to Rin's face. Obviously she was not amused to have her face drenched and her secret out in the open. It was worse to have spilled it to a drunken Hokage, who would spill it anytime to anyone.

Rin growled and launched herself at Kakashi. They rolled around wrestling and more often that not, Kakashi's "watch the book, damn you" was heard. The Hokage looked at them and opened a new bottle of sake.

"Tsunade-sama!" Shizune rushed in and her eyes widened at the scene. "Why aren't you stopping this?"

"Weeeeelllll," Tsunade tipped her chair back and flopped her foot on the table covered with undone papers. "This is … is entertainment and I'm learning a new way to beat…. that…that…" The Hokage struggled to find words and stopped trying when her chair tipped over.

"I'm…fine," she mumbled and fell asleep…or was it unconscious?

**With Sakura, Sasuke, and Naruto:**

"AHHHHH!" Naruto's voice was getting hoarse but he didn't stop.

"Shut up dobe," Sasuke muttered, his hands covering his ears. "I can't do anything with you killing my eardrums."

Sakura was whimpering as she stepped on the purple dinosaur. Who would torture them like this? They were kids!

"It's okay Naruto," She hugged him close and stared at the thing that had been giving them nightmares.

"Hello children. I've come to take care of you," they heard a chirping voice. Sasuke instantly hated the sugary and too happy voice. Sakura stepped on the dinosaur harder and frowned. That voice sounded awfully familiar.

"Look up here!" They stared in the closet where they saw a flash of light and heard a "ping." The thing in the closet came down and Sasuke's eyebrow ticked in annoyance. Damn it, he didn't have his sunglasses and his eyes were burning.

"Fuzzy-brows, what're you doing in our closet?!" Naruto pointed at Lee, who laughed happily.

"My team was instructed to baby sit you guys. Yosh, I shall do my best and we'll start by running thirty laps on our hands. Sakura-chan, this will show my love---"

_Thud_.

Lee dropped like a stone.

Sakura lowered her arms and dropped the shovel Sasuke loved so much. Naruto's eyes widened and Sasuke smirked. He laughed gleefully inside his head and cheered on his girlfriend. He crossed over to his shocked girlfriend and pulled her into his arms.

"Sasuke-teme! Don't do grownup stuff with Sakura-chan in front of me!" Naruto covered his eyes and turned around. Sasuke ignored the dobe and he bent his head to whisper to his girlfriend.

"Don't worry Sakura; I'll get rid of the ugly thing for you." Sakura's arms tightened and she nodded. Unknown to Sasuke, his arms tightened as well and they rocked back and forth for what seemed like eternity to Naruto, who was moaning about perverted emo temes. Suddenly as if Sasuke realized what he was doing, he let Sakura go and quickly grabbed his shovel.

Oh his wonderful shovel that Sakura had taken and now given back. How he had missed it! Sasuke grabbed the shovel in one hand and the unconscious Lee in the other. He trotted away happily, the two things dragging on the floor. Before Sakura could say anything to her boyfriend's retreating back the doorbell rang.

"Oh," Sakura whispered in awe "it's you." Naruto appeared at the door behind her and stared the two people.

"Do you have ramen? Sakura's father isn't feeding me," then he glared suddenly "If you don't have, you can leave right now. So do you, huh?"

**With Kakashi and Rin:**

"What's wrong with everyone?" Rin whispered to herself. Things were so odd and occurring so randomly she didn't know what to do or how to react. "Is this even normal?"

"Oh, this is normal everyday life here," Kakashi flipped another page. "Gai is always stalking me and challenging me. You would know these things if you hadn't gotten eaten by sharks and then gotten amnesia."

Rin's jaw dropped is astonishment. How the hell did that even make sense?!

"I never said that, you ba----. Hey, pay attention when I'm talking to you!" Rin shouted at the masked man, who had already gone into a store. Rin looked at the store and blushed deeply. There was no way she was going into the store where they sold those perverted books. Rin slid to the sidewalk in front of the store and sat there for who knows how long waiting for the white haired ninja.

"What took you so long?" She barked when he came out and was irked even more when he ignored her.

"Answer me!" Rin sped up her pace to keep up with him. Kakashi suddenly stopped and turned.

"Why do I have to answer to you? Who are you? My wife?" he clipped out. "I don't entirely believe you and I sure as hell don't see you as Rin because Rin is dead to me…forever."

Rin stopped walking and stared bleakly at Kakashi's back as he kept walking.

**Kakashi p.o.v.:**

Rin… back after all this time… and at a time where enemies like Pein and Orochimaru were surrounding them. What was he supposed to believe? How was he supposed to feel when a dead teammate came back alive and wanted to insert her presence into his life?

Kakashi continued to walk confused as ever yet his eyes never left his book. To onlookers he seemed happy and absorbed in his book.

**With Sasuke**:

Sasuke shoved more dirt onto the mound that was Lee's form. Sasuke laughed evilly…in his head and wondered if should place flowers on top of the grave, and then decided not to because it was too fruity for him to and not evil enough.

"Mppmmphh," a groan came from underneath dirt. Sasuke glanced at the place where the face was and growled. He was tired of the spandex wearing freak becoming conscious and uncovering the dirt from his face. What part of being buried and staying buried didn't the freak understand?

Sasuke whacked Lee on the head and nodded in satisfaction when Lee's head fell into the hole again.

"Well hello there, dear pupil of my rival!" Sasuke turned slowly and stared blankly at the older version of Lee. Why was this moron here?

"What are you doing with a shovel, hmm?" Gai smiled brightly at Sasuke

"Hn," Sasuke covered his eyes and glared harder. Why had he forgotten his sunglasses again?! Gai didn't notice Sasuke's glare and answered his own question. "I see you're planting flowers. What a youthful thing to do! I shall call Lee to help," Gai shouted with excitement. "LEE!"

Lee's Gai sensei radar went on alert and he became awake. Gai sensei frowned and blinked at the large mound.

"Lee, my gorgeous spandex wearing student, is that you?" When Gai leaned towards Lee's grave, Sasuke whacked him with the shovel.

"Hn," Sasuke blinked at Gai's limp body and proceeded to dig another grave. He had to finish before Sakura found out.

END

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**Preview:**

Sasuke stared blankly at the scene in front of him. There was Sakura having tea with the bear Sasuke (who was filled with dirt, thanks to him) and… Hyuuga.

"Would you like more tea, my prince?" Sakura leaned towards Neji and poured him more tea in a dainty looking cup.

Sasuke laughed his ass off…in his head of course and on the outside he smirked. Hyuuga was having a tea party! Sasuke couldn't wait to blackmail Hyuuga until something hit him; Sakura was calling him "prince".

What the hell was his girlfriend doing calling another man "my prince"?!

**AND**

"Kakashi, you have a daughter." Kakashi gave Rin a "isn't that oblivious, stupid?" look.

"I was thinking-"

"Don't. It'll tax you're brain too much," his eyes crinkled yet his voice was dry.

"Very funny, Kakashi. I was thinking….ahh…who is her mother?" Rin bit her lip, not truly wanting to know who he had loved enough to have a daughter with.

Kakashi in the mean time was frozen and just stared in front of him.

"Anko!" He blurted out.

ANKO?!

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A/N: Again sorry for the late update. Tell me what you think and the previous previews will be in the next chapter. Also, I think this time around things are more tightly knit than the previous chaps. Review? Thnxs. AppleBloss.


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